REBBL - REL Season 8 - Week 4

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# Week 4 Contents

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### Articles by the REL Writers
  - [<span>3</span><span>Interview with a Champion - Ornan</span>](#p3)
  - [<span>4</span><span>Top 5 Report</span>](#p4)
  - [<span>6</span><span>Nocternal's Picks of the Week</span>](#p6)
  - [<span>8</span><span>Did you know?</span>](#p8)
  - [<span>9</span><span>Racial Spotlight</span>](#p9)

<br>

The REL Roundup is looking for additional writers for our magazine. Do you have an idea that you want to write content for? Let us know! Contact GypsyPrince in Discord or Gyspy22 in Reddit.

<br>

### REL Recap Channels
  - [<span>Div 1, 2 & 3</span><span>SuperFedTv</span>](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkXNnSfR4Xtpb4oVySWfhwA)
  - [<span>Div 6</span><span>The Golden Apple of Discord</span>](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCS9IvNNXocVQ6i4ZCfdR2jg/videos)
  - [<span>Div 8 & 9A</span><span>Rusty Seabutter</span>](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZ9muaTx8ceUljGy2Ey7HQubHLITABA4u)
  - [<span>Div 8 & 9A</span><span>Iron Madden</span>](https://www.twitch.tv/videos/239077559)
  - [<span>Div 9D & 9E</span><span>Steakmittens</span>](https://www.youtube.com/user/borinbrikmalet/featured)

<br>

If you have a recap channel that you want highlighted, let us know! This is an arbitrary list based on posts found on Reddit.

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## Notes from the Editors

<b>3, 4 and 5 cheers</b> for the folks that helps recruit additional players to fill out the lower divisions. This impacts me directly, as I have more victims in 9D, and I appreciate this.

#### - GypsyPrince

<br>A special thank you to Mr. Christie for the cover suggestion this week. Sorry we could not get the specifics, but we will get it next time! If you have a suggestion from a game or highlight for our next cover, do get in touch!
#### - Phil

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## Credits
**Articles Written by:** <br>
*Larkstar*<br>
*AndrewS*<br>
*Nocternal*
___
**Guest Writer**:<br>
*Nuffle, for they truly write the story*
___
**Imagery by:**<br>
*Phil-is-Offi-Cool*

___
**Layout by:**<br>
*GypsyPrince*

**Cover Art:**

Star player Deeproot attacks <br>[Halflings are relevant]

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# Interview with a Champion - Ornan

From his mind, to his fingers, to his keyboard, through the interwebs, into this newspaper and into your mind!  Ornan is basically touching you right this instant!

Everyone has listened to your post championship interview, and if you haven’t you need to get your butt to [The Punching Annex Interivew](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6DLEWAZppEM&ab_channel=RustySeabutter). But your adoring fans yearn to learn more about the man, the myth, and legend!

1. YOU are a real-life Blood Bowl player!  Gives us your stats and skills!

“As much as I dislike playing Bretonnians, I do like taking more obscure ways to victory. If I were to choose I’d be a Bret Blitzer with Dodge, Sidestep, Frenzy, and Shadowing.”

2. What’s your favorite movie?  If you can’t decide give us your top 3.

“My top three favorite movies would be in any order: The Dark Knight because of Heath Ledger, The Artist, and Guardians of the Galaxy.”

3. What is your go-to beverage while playing BB matches?

“I prefer water because I’ll down tons of the stuff without noticing, and if I do that with beer or some soft drink I’m not going to be feeling good afterwards.”

4. If you had one, what would you name your boat?

“The S.S Express. It’d be a tugboat and I’d have it designed like a train car.”

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5. Norse love to injure people!  What’s the dumbest way YOU have ever been injured?

“I have a tie for ways I was injured when I was younger, both being the equivalent of my injuring myself on Death Floor. The first stupid injury was when I was two running around the house like a madman, and I ran square into a rectangular table corner. Got a hospital trip and a nice mark on my nose to show for it.

The second one was when I tore my ear off climbing a pile of snow. It turns out slipping next to a telephone pole with climbing spikes in it isn’t the best way to spend a snow day. This was when I was around seven, and I didn’t even notice my ear was hanging off. It did hurt so I went back inside, and as soon as my mother saw me everything got loud and crazy and soon I got another hospital trip.”

6. Other than coaching BB, what is your most useless talent?

“I can wait and think about stuff for just about any amount of time given without getting bored. I once waited for a bus for about seven hours without really being bothered.”

7. If you could change one thing about BB, what would it be?

“Probably a slew of buffs to make some of the legendary edition races better. The main ones that come to mind are for Goblins. Goblin Bombardier with passing access, Goblin Trolls without loner, maybe give the Pogo another skill it make it worth taking? -Shadowing- perhaps?”

### Rapid Fire Round!
**Coffee or Tea?** “Tea. It’s rich.”

**Pizza or Burgers?** “Burgers.”

**Dinosaurs or Aliens?** “Aliens.”

**Block or Dodge?** “Shadowing.”

**Polar Bears or Penguins?** “Penguins!”

<br>**Thanks for giving us your time Ornan!  And best of luck with your defense of the title!**

#### - Larkstar

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# Top 5 Report Week 4

Every week we scour various data sources to bring to you some notable players and teams from REL that are leading the pack in glamorous (sometimes unglamorous) fashion. This week we dive down and see whose been the baron of broken bones! And after, we take a look at the teams whose life insurance premiums are going up!

### Top 5 Maimers

- Great Brown Cloud - Chaos Beastman - Straight-Up-Flatuence - 11 Casualties

Great Brown Cloud is the meanest individual to take the pitch this season so far. At 11 casualties, this beastman has been punching his foes straight to the infirmary! At 143 SPP, we may even see a legend beastman killer but for now this ravaging beastman is the star on this chaos team!

- Walter - Chaos Warrior - Lebowski Urban Achievers - 11 Casualties

Walter takes the co-top spot with 11 casualties of their own! What makes this player impressive is that he did not learn block until way into development! Who needs defensive skills when youve got claws like serrated knives and an unparalleled elbow drop! We’ll have to see who wins the race to the top puncher between these two chaos players in a few weeks!

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- Kleio Valentien - Orc Blitzer - Brazzerz - 10 Casualties

At third features our first non-chaos player Kleio. At 10 casualties inflicted this Orc is finding himself right behind the top spots in the casualty leaderboards. With jump up, tackle, and pro, this player is likely to be very active in their games. On their career, Kleio has inflicted 28 casualties.

- Lassie - Necromantic Werewolf - Film Flayers - 10 Casualties

Lassie is tied with Kleio and the final member of our list at 10 casualties. Of course it wouldn’t be an injury leaderboard without at least one wolf making it into the mix. It’s still early for Lassie’s career but their skills and skulls are piling up for this up and coming wolf. A unique stat about Lassie is that in 13 games last season, they inflicted no casualties. I guess its better late than never to make up for the lack of injuries!

- Belmoth Kha Dhy - Chaos Warrior - Cenobite the Curb - 10 Casualties

The final member of the trio tied for third and on our list features yet another player of Chaos who has taken a liking to injuring others on the pitch! Featuring a jump up and piling on warrior this chaos player is up and down so much he probably doesn’t know where he is! On his career Belmoth has 25 total casualties inflicted.

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### Top 5 Deaths

- The Bad QB Squad - Underworld - Division 8<br> 6 Deaths Sustained

This poor downtrodden underworld team seems to be down on their luck for the season. At 6 deaths, they tie in a leaderboard where you do not want to lead. They feature a game where 3 of their own died within a single match. All hope is not all lost, as Ryan Fitzpatrick, their big guy, is still alive and leads the team in SPP. A strong big guy may return this team to better days!

-  Pantheon Passers - Elven Union - Division 3<br> 6 Deaths Sustained

This team features some similar situations as before. They also have a game where three of their own perished within a single match! With only 5 players left on the team, theyre likely to face some high TV differences for the remainder of the season. With most of the team featuring some niggling injuries too it might be a rough going for this elf team to finish off season 8.

- Maximum Ogrekill - Ogre  - Division 6<br> 5 Deaths Sustained

Former stunty cup champions Ogrekill is paying their stunty dues this season with 5 deaths on the young season already. With most of the deaths coming from gnoblars it certainly isnt the worst situation to be in for Ogrekill, who are struggling to find footing in their division as opposed to last season, where they finished off with 20 points.

- Pro-in a Party - Elven Union - Division 3<br> 5 Deaths Sustained

The next Elf team to be featured on this list is surprising another union team! With 5 deaths from Pro this tallies it to 11 deaths between both of these Elven Union teams in division 3. These elves have 9 members left on the team so things arent as dire and to top it off, theyre 6th in division 3. Things surely can turn to the bright side real quick for this team.

- Cheesetactics mk.II - Orc - Division 2 <br>3 Deaths Sustained

The last team to feature the list doesn’t have a ton of deaths, but theyre starting to rack up in terms of SPP lost. Losing a big guy on top of it for one of the three deaths is not pretty. With their results so far, a break sometime soon would be a much welcome respite for this orc team who have only won one match on the season.

#### - AndrewS

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# Nocternal's Picks of the Week #5

Hey Round-Up Readers, time for another look into the crazy games coming up in Week 5. Lets see what kind of shenanigans we can dredge up from the bowels of this nigh unstoppable murder train.

### REL 1 never disappoints:

- Eat-Eat-Man-Things (Skaven) vs <br>Tadpoles in the Big City (Lizardmen)

This game is going to make some Bookies either very rich or very poor. We have the elite Gutter Runner section of Eat-Eat Man Things looking to break through tthe defence of the Tadpoles. The Lizzies dont have much in the way of Tackle players to keep those speedy Rats in place so unless you see the big hits coming from Tadpole Saurus Joe Dirt (Block, PO, Mb, Tackle, Jump Up) and Blanky (Block, MB, Break Tackle, Jug). Only Cas will give them a chance at the win. 
Winner: Eat-Eat-Man-Things

### Things are looking rather bleak in REL 2:

- Not FDA Approved (High Elfs) vs <br>Leafy Mustard (Lizardmen)

This game is looking REALLY one-sided with Not FDA looking worse for the wear these last few weeks. The one player that will save their collective (Soy) Bacon is their St5 Blitzer Super Dragon 6000. They do, however, maitain some form of scoring threat with Catcher One More Knight (+Ag, Block, Dodge, Side Step, Leap). Leafy Mustard has nearly all the tools to deal with this understrength Helf team. The only thing that would stem the Lizard tide is a few clutch Skink injuries.

> ##### Winner: Leafy Mustard

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### Is it getting darker in REL 3?:

- Necromantic Newbies (Necromantic) vs <br>Midsummer Nightmares (Dark Elfs)

Here are two very competitive looking teams. The Newbies look to have dodged any real loses so far this season and the Wolves and Golems are looking great (except for that tiny -Ma on Matt Ioannidis) They have all the right skills that they need to take all comers but will it be enough to bridal the Nightmares? This black horses also have some players that will be looking great towards the end of the season (if they survive that long). With 7 dodge players I don’t think we will be seeing more than a couple dozen blocks taken by the Newbies. This is a game to watch!

> ##### Winner: Midsummer Nightmares

### REL 4 is back with a mean streak:

- Le Grand Bleu (Wood Elfs) vs <br>Da Secret of My Success (Orc)

The quintessential Agi vs Bash game. Grand Bleu is looking in top for with a full squad (rare for Woodies in REL) including some tough Wardancers, two great Catchers and a damn fine Tree. Don’t rule out DSMS just yet though. The Green tide will be bringing plenty of MB and Tackle to show these Treehuggers the error of their ways. This one is almost too close to call but I think the Elfs will break before they get too far ahead of the Orcs. But you know how Nuffle can be.

> ##### Winner: Da Secret of My Success

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### Full Frontal Bash from REL 5:

- Khorne’s Glory (Chaos) vs <br>Fear_and_Bloating (Nurgle)

Khorne’s Glory is everything that a Kill Chaos team hopes to be. Near Every player is ready to bring the pain as the team is just stacked with MB and a couple claw. This team will live up to it’s bloody namesake! F_a_B will need to do something noval for a Nurgle team and play the ball if they want to somehow come out of this game with a victory. This clash of Chaos Gods will finally prove who is the best (Keep the sacrificial daggers handy and grab a discount virgin before they run out).

> ##### Winner: Khorne’s Glory

### From one bloodletting to another in REL 6:

- YOU Worship Chaos (Norse) vs <br>LizardBeast (Lizardmen)

YOU Worship Chaos will be playing the Glass Cannon to LizardBeast this week. While YWC is looking better with some offensive skills, LizardBeast is looking rather light on Saurus levels. This norse team will want that luck to continue if they want any chance to pull out the victory here. And I think they can as long as the Banana Hammocks keep everything safe. LizardBeasts saving grace are the skill heavy Skinks he has. If he can keep those itty bitty lizzies safe, he can pull this one right out from under YWC.

> ##### Winner: YOU Worship Chaos

### REL 7 where all the games get played before Sunday:

No point is guessing who wins when everyone is already played.
Winner: I guess we all win a little here. Just take however long it was to read this bit and have a sandwich or something. I’m not your mom.

That is all I can write about REL Week 5. You all have a great time getting out there and ruining each other's dreams of Playoff Contention (I know REL 2 did that to me already!).

#### -Nocturnal

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# Did You Know?

**“Snakes Eyes”** was coined somewhere between 1919 and the early 1930s by gamblers who looked down upon their losing roll and saw a pair of beady little black eyes hissing back up at them.  Resembling the evil glare of the slithering reptiles, and wrought with just as much misfortune, a meme was formed before memes were even cool… and then uncool… and then cool again!  However, had any of these drunken degenerates simply picked up a history book before turning to a life chance and debauchery, they would know there was already an established term for the lowest possible dice roll!

Dice games date back to ancient Egypt (Roll like an Egyption?).  But it was the Ancient Romans who truly upped the ante by combining dice games with drinking, brothels, and life or death situations!  When six-sided dice failed their masters by showing the lowly Single Dot, these gamers were nothing better than dogs!  Voilà! (That’s actually French because I don’t know any Latin, and it will have to do.)  Voilà, thus was born **“The Dog Throw”**!

But in the game of Blood Bowl we don’t have any snakes, or dogs for that matter.  Face it, Vegas gamblers aren’t exactly the role models we deserve.  And the Romans, don’t even get me started on the Romans!  (Did you know Gladiators consumed an energy drink made from goat dung?!?!)  Then it hit me like a Thrown Rock!  WE NEED OUR OWN TERM!  What’s the lowest of the possible lows in Blood Bowl?  Anyone?  Bueller?!  Come on, it’s easy!  And it was recently stolen from us by those self-righteous video game designers!  They took our Snotlings!  Let us return to our roots, fellow coaches.  Let us pay homage to our lost and misbegotten friends!  Let us take back our game and rename double 1s to ... **THE SNOT TOSS!!!**

Brothers and Sisters, let’s make this happen!

#### - Larkstar

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# Racial Spotlight

In these articles, we search all along the various dungeons and annals looking for teams of each race that are special towards the game of bloodbowl and towards REL. While some teams might not ever see the light of day in the higher divisions of play the aim is to highlight each race to give a spotlight to teams so that we may learn more about them.
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## This Week: Lizardmen & Dwarves!

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### Lizardmen

**How many in REL?:** 16

**Highest Division with one?:** Division 1 (2 Teams)

**How many Rookie Teams?:** 7

The Lizardmen are the second most represented race in REL. Not only do the reptiles have good representation in the higher divisions, but 7 rookie teams means there is very high representation amongst the newer teams as well. Leading the pack in division 1 right now features the Skinky Island Boiz, who have only dropped a single game this season. Lets take a look at some impact Lizardmen players on the season.

**Best Scorer:** Jennifer - Skink - Cold Blooded Exes - 5 Touchdowns

**Most Dangerous Player:** Carnotsa - Saurus - Cantankerous Cretaceans - 7 Casualties

**SPP MVP:** Beerhead - Skink - Cantankerous Cretaceans - 25 SPP Earned

As shown above, the top lizardmen are spread out throughout REL, with none of the top players actually coming from division 1. During the playoffs last season The Skinky Island Boiz were the furthest REL Lizardmen team to make it, losing to the eventual champions, New Years Norse in the round of 16. With the amount of representation in REL this season for the scales they will surely have a chance to go deeper into the tournament.

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### Dwarves

**How many in REL?:** 9

**Highest Division with one?:** Division 1 (The Three Mountains)

**How many Rookie Teams?:** 3

The Dwarves have a moderate representation in REL, having just missed double digit representation. The Dwarves look fairly top heavy, with 5 teams represented in the upper divisions, but rarely seen in the lower ones. The top team, The Three Mountains, is finding themselves in the lower half of the leaderboards in division 1. Lets see some notable dwarves on the season so far!

**Best Scorer:** Dom Santiago - Runner - Cogs of War IV - 5 Touchdowns

**Most Dangerous Player:** Milan Luich- Troll - Troll Slayer - Oil Miners - 6 Casualties

**SPP MVP:** Dom Santiago - Runner - Cogs of War IV - 18 SPP Earned

As shown by above you can see that some of these developing dwarven teams are sure to take off sooner rather than later. There may be even more high division dwarf teams in the making very soon. During the playoffs REL Dwarves fared pretty bad with a quit exit in the first round for the only dwarf team from REL, The Three Mountains. With their position in the leaderboards this season, Three Mountains have some work cut out for them to make a shot at redemption.

**Next Weeks Coverage includes The Fabulous Amazon and the Berserking Norse!**

#### - AndrewS