Anime Bullshit for DMs Who Love It

Alchemist's Cindergloves

Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement)

These thin white cloth gloves are stylish and covered in runes sewn into the fabric. The gloves have 4 charges and regain 1d4 charges every dawn. While attuned to these gloves, you can cast the firebolt cantrip if you do not already know it. As an action, you can expend 1 charge to cast scorching ray or burning hands, 2 charges to cast fireball, or 4 charges to cast fire shield (warm shield only), ignoring all components. If the gloves have gotten wet or you have taken cold damage within the past 30 minutes, the spell fizzles out. Your casting ability for these spells is Intelligence.

Spectacles of the Stampede

Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement)

While wearing these stylish eyeglasses with distinctive Z-shaped arms, the range of any dark or low-light vision you have is doubled and you have advantage on all Wisdom (Perception) checks relying on eyesight. You ignore the loading properties of crossbows or firearms with which you are proficient, and being within 5 feet of a hostile creature does not impose disadvantage on your ranged weapon attacks.

This item has 6 charges and restores 1d4 charges every dawn. When making a ranged weapon attack, you can expend a charge to grant yourself advantage on the attack roll.

Sage's Beans

Wondrous item, very rare

This simple cloth bag contains 4d4 green beans, which are completely lacking in taste yet incredibly revitalizing, healing all but the most deadly wounds in an instant. As a bonus action, you can eat a bean from the bag. All diseases and poisons currently affecting you are removed, you can instantly expend hit dice up to half your maximum and heal as though finishing a short rest, and you do not need to eat anything else for the next ten days. Any additional sage's beans consumed have no effect until the end of that ten-day period.

Reaper's Eye

Wondrous item, legendary (requires attunement)

This unassuming monocle fits easily over either eye. While looking through the monocle, you can see through illusions and see invisible or ethereal creatures, and you know the true name of anyone or anything you can see within 100 feet. As an action, you can focus on a creature you can see and discern its ability scores, how many hit points it has remaining (as a rough percentage of its maximum) and any vulnerabilities, resistances, or immunities. You can not do this again until you finish a short rest.

Curse. The monocle is cursed, a fact that is revealed only if you attune to it. When you attune to the Reaper's Eye, your maximum hit points are reduced by half, rounded down. This curse lasts until you are targeted by a remove curse spell or other similar effect.

Drill of the Digger

Wondrous item, very rare

This small, palm-sized conical drill seems to be shining with a faint green light from inside. When you speak its command word, the drill grows in size to one foot across and begins rotating. For the next ten minutes, while holding the drill in front of you, you have a burrowing speed of 30 feet through earth and 15 feet through solid rock. You leave a tunnel behind you that a Medium-sized creature can comfortably crawl through.

You can instead make a melee attack with the drill, treating it as a Finesse weapon with which you are proficient. On a hit, the target takes 1d4 piercing damage. As part of this attack, you can speak the command word to activate the drill inside the creature's body. The target must make a DC 18 Dexterity saving throw. On a failure, the target takes 8d8 slashing damage and is restrained, taking half as much damage and being pushed up to 5 feet away from you (in a direction of your choosing) on a success.

You can invoke the drill's command word once per day, resetting every moonrise.

Sutras of the West

Scroll, very rare

Though the foreign letters covering this scroll seem like gibberish and defy even arcane means of comprehension, a character capable of casting divine magic (e.g. a Cleric, Druid, or Paladin) intuitively understands how to read it.

A character that can read this mystic scripture must spend approximately 20 seconds (in combat, 3 rounds) chanting the words on the scroll. When the incantation is complete, all hostile creatures of the caster's choosing within 120 feet must make a DC 22 Wisdom saving throw, suffering 20d6 radiant damage on a failure and half as much on a success. Celestials, fey, and fiends that fail the saving throw are either paralyzed for 1 minute or banished to their home plane, the caster's choice. Undead that fail the saving throw and survive are turned.

If the caster fails a Concentration check while reading the sutras, the cast is interrupted and must be restarted, but the scroll is not destroyed unless the spell is successfully cast.

The Pharaoh's Deck

Wondrous item, uncommon

This deck of playing cards seems completely ordinary at a glance. However, when you invoke the command phrase, “the heart of the cards,” the next card drawn by any player will be the card of your choice, unless it is already held by you or another player.

The Pharaoh's Deck [Boring but More Practical Version]

Wondrous item, uncommon

This deck of playing cards seems completely ordinary at a glance. However, when you mentally invoke its command word, the next card drawn by any player will be the card of your choice, unless it is already held by you or another player.

Orb of Beast Taming

Wondrous item, uncommon

This wooden ball fits comfortably in the palm of your hand and is covered in special magical marks. When you invoke the command word, you can use a bonus action to make a ranged attack and throw the ball, dealing 1d4 bludgeoning damage on a hit. If the target is a beast, it is turned into life energy and absorbed into the ball, and must make a Strength saving throw. On a success, it forces its way out of confinement; on a failure, it is trapped in stasis and does not age, nor does it require food, drink, or air.

As a bonus action, you can release the beast from the orb; it has been magically tamed and will now follow your orders. You can return the beast to the orb at any time; if unconscious, it will be stabilized. The beast is considered attuned to this particular orb, and you cannot catch another beast in this manner without freeing the first one from its magical bond, which can be done freely at any time, or as a bonus action in combat. After freeing the beast, it will no longer be considered tamed and will react accordingly.

The saving throw DC for the creature to break free of the orb is 18 minus its challenge rating. It has advantage on this saving throw if it is above 75% of its maximum hit points, and disadvantage if it is below 25%.

Seele Spectacles

Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement)

These shiny, opaque glasses make it difficult to read your intentions. While attuned to the glasses, you are shielded from any attempts to read your mind, such as the detect thoughts spell. While wearing them, Wisdom (Insight) rolls made against you have disadvantage.

Meridies' Floating Disk

Wondrous item, rare

An attempt to outdo Tenser by creating a version of the spell anyone can use, this metal disk is 3 feet in diameter and 1 inch thick, but surprisingly light to hold. When the disk's command word is spoken, it hovers 3 feet above the ground, and can hold up to 400 pounds. The disk has a fly speed of 25 and a maximum height of 50 feet. If it ever exceeds this maximum height, such as being released from a high place, it will descend slowly, as if under the feather fall spell, but cannot be controlled or steered until it returns within 50 feet of the ground.

Yuuri's Boots of Skating

Wondrous item, uncommon

These warm, comfortable boots are made for cold environments, and stabilize perfectly on slippery surfaces. While wearing them, you do not need to make Dexterity (Acrobatics) checks to move quickly across slippery terrain such as ice, and have advantage on Constitution checks to stave off the effects of cold weather.

Cap of the Platinum Star

Wondrous item, very rare (requires attunement)

Wearing this flat-brimmed cap allows you to summon an invisible spectral bodyguard to aid in your attacks. The cap has 5 charges. When you hit an enemy within 5 feet of you with a melee attack on your turn, you can expend a charge as a bonus action to command the bodyguard to make two additional unarmed strikes, as though using flurry of blows. These strikes use your Charisma modifier and Proficiency bonus for attack rolls and damage, and do damage according to your character level on the Monk's unarmed strikes table.

As a bonus action, you can spend 4 charges to cast time stop, ignoring all components. When casting the spell in this way, time is stopped for 1 turn. The cap regains 1d4+1 charges every day at midnight.

Niconi's Charm of Smiles

Wondrous item, rare

This small, heart-shaped charm seems like a child's toy at first glance. You can invoke its power with a command gesture. The target must make a Charisma saving throw (DC 16) or be charmed by you for up to one hour, regarding you as a friend. Even on a successful save or after the spell fades, the target does not know they were charmed by you.

Armor & Clothing

Bloodfiber Vestments

Clothing (unarmored), very rare (requires attunement)

Made of living fibers, these clothes can alter their appearance seemingly at will. Every day at sunrise, you can choose a new appearance (style, color, fit, etc.) for the clothes as you please. Regardless of their current chosen appearance, whenever you roll for initiative, the living fibers instantly shorten to cover as little as possible for ease of movement, completely concealing only the groin area and covering the chest with mere straps. After finishing combat, the clothes return to their previous appearance.

Unarmored Defense. If you are wearing no other clothes, no other armor, and not carrying a shield, whenever the Bloodfiber Vestments are in their combat state, your base Armor Class becomes equal to 12 + your Dexterity modifier + your choice of either your Constitution or Wisdom modifiers. You can change which every day at sunrise. You cannot benefit from any other Unarmored Defense feature, but your AC can still be increased by spells, character feats, or other class features.

Blood Rush. The fibers gain strength from feeding on their wearer's blood. As a bonus action on your turn, you can choose to suffer 1d4 necrotic damage. If you do, you immediately take the Dash action as part of the same bonus action. You can instead choose to suffer 1d6 necrotic damage as a bonus action. If you do, you can immediately make a single weapon attack, with advantage, as part of that same bonus action. Necrotic damage taken from using the Bloodfiber Vestments cannot be reduced in any way.

Red Comet's Helm

Armor (helmet), very rare (requires attunement)

This brilliant white helmet, which covers the head and masks the eyes, is styled after the one worn by the legendary warlord Red Comet Charr, a controversial figure sung of as both noble hero and dastardly villain. It is enchanted to give the wearer a fraction of the Red Comet's preternatural senses. While wearing this helmet, your Armor Class is increased by 2, you have advantage on Dexterity saving throws and cannot be surprised, and attacks made against you by hidden or unseen enemies do not have advantage.

As a bonus action, you can invoke the power of the Red Comet. On your next turn, your movement speed is tripled. You regain the use of this feature every midnight.

Brand of Samekh

Armor (any), rare (requires attunement)

This armor is enchanted with ancient runes and increases your Armor Class by 1 when worn. When you first attune to this armor, it vanishes into a small pocket plane, and one of the armor's runes appears as a tattooed mark on the back of your hand. As an action, you can invoke the command word of the tattoo to summon the armor from its pocket plane, instantly donning it above whatever clothing you are currently wearing. You can likewise invoke the command word to dismiss the armor into the plane, instantly doffing it and returning to whatever clothing you were wearing beneath it.

Weapons

Morgann, Knight-King's Saber

Weapon (longsword), legendary (requires attunement)

You gain a +3 bonus to attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon, used by an ancient warrior king, the leader of a mythic band of heroic knights.

Wind swirls around the blade, masking its true length and making it difficult to defend against; you have advantage on attacks made against any target with at least one creature hostile to it in an adjacent space, and you ignore any extra AC from a target's Parry reaction.

As a bonus action, you can dispel the swirling wind, releasing the blade's true radiance. While the blade is visible, you no longer receive the benefits of the wind described above, but the sword now emits bright golden light for 30 feet and dim light for another 30 feet and deals an extra 1d10 radiant damage on hit. You can re-summon the swirling wind as a bonus action.

On a subsequent turn, when you use an action to make an attack with the revealed blade, you can choose instead to fully unleash its power. The sword's golden light erupts in a beam 10 feet wide and 150 feet long, which passes through walls and ignores complete cover. This light is sunlight. Each creature caught in the beam must make a Dexterity saving throw. On a failure, they take 15d6 radiant damage and suffer the effects of the divine word spell, determined after damage is resolved. On a success, they take half as much damage and do not suffer the effects of divine word.

Afterwards, the blade's radiance is diminished, and it loses all magic properties except for its attack and damage bonuses until the next dawn.

Sword of Promised Saberfaces

Weapon (longsword), legendary (requires attunement)

The same as the previous one, except this one is cursed.

Curse. The blade is cursed, a fact that is revealed only if you attune to it. When you attune to this sword, your body takes on the form of the mythical king of knights, which was previously unbeknownst to history: You become a blonde human girl in her late teens, though your ability scores do not change. Unattuning to the sword has no effect; your form remains changed until you are the target of a remove curse, greater restoration, or other similar spell.

Soulreaper

Weapon (scythe), legendary (requires attunement by a non-Evil character)

A scythe has the following basic properties: It is heavy, two-handed, and deals 2d4 + Strength modifier slashing damage.

At a first glance, it is obvious that this scythe is built for combat rather than farming, with a strong handle built from sturdy oak and a wide blade that never dulls. A character must be proficient in martial weaponry to effectively wield such a unique combat weapon.

You gain a +1 bonus to attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon. It has the following additional properties:

Sentience. Soulreaper is a sentient chaotic good weapon with an Intelligence of 12, a Wisdom of 9, and a Charisma of 15. It has hearing and darkvision out to a range of 120 feet.

The weapon can speak, read, and understand Common, and can communicate with its wielder telepathically. While you are attuned to it, Soulreaper also understands every language you know.

Soul Eater. After you use Soulreaper to reduce a dangerous creature (CR of half your level or more, rounded up) to 0 hit points, its soul is absorbed into the weapon, unless it is a construct or undead. A creature whose soul has been consumed by Soulreaper can be restored to life only by a wish spell. A fiend's soul is consumed regardless of its CR.

Evolving Weapon. With every wicked soul consumed, Soulreaper grows more powerful. Consuming an Evil or Unaligned soul grants Soulreaper 1 Soul Level; if the soul is that of a fiend, it grants Soulreaper 2 Soul Levels instead. Reaching specific Soul Level thresholds grants Soulreaper additional permanent properties, as shown in the table below:

• Soul Level 20: Deftness. Soulreaper gains the finesse property.
• Soul Level 30: Sated. Soulreaper's damage and attack bonus increases to +2.
• Soul Level 50: Mageslayer. Damage dealt by Soulreaper imposes disadvantage on Concentration checks.
• Soul Level 60: Engorged. Soulreaper's damage and attack bonus increases to +3.
• Soul Level 75: Independent. Soulreaper gains the ability to hover in midair and move independently of you. As a bonus action, you can release Soulreaper into the air and control it as though casting the spell spiritual weapon.
• Soul Level 80: Razoredge. Soulreaper's base damage die becomes 3d4.
• Soul Level 100: Executioner. Soulreaper gains the vorpal property.

If Soulreaper is made to consume the soul of a Neutral-aligned creature, it loses enough Soul Levels to reduce it to its most recent threshold (e.g., if it were at Soul Level 74, it would return to Soul Level 60.) If Soulreaper is made to consume the soul of a Good-aligned creature, it loses all accumulated Soul Levels.

For every month Soulreaper does not feed, it loses a Soul Level.

Personality. Soulreaper is brash and confident, and is eager to pay evil unto evil. It is adamant that it exists to hunt down and eliminate evildoers, particularly evil magic-users, and is suspicious of any magic-users in its wielder's party who are not clearly Good-aligned.

If your alignment becomes Evil at any point after you have attuned to Soulreaper, and it has attained Soul Level 75, the next time you release it in battle, it will turn on you instead. If you do not release it, or if it has not yet attained Soul Level 75, the next time you are reduced to 0 hit points, you must make a DC 20 Constitution saving throw (made before falling unconscious). On a failure, Soulreaper consumes your soul and you are destroyed, and can only be restored to life by a wish spell.

Storm of Infinite Swords

I am the bone of my sword...

8th-level conjuration

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Self

Components: V, M (a magic sword worth at least 900 GP)

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

Classes: Wizard, Sorcerer, Bard

You and all other creatures within a 50 foot radius are transported to the Plane of Blades, an apparently endless wasteland where immense cogs and gears turn in the sky, and the ground is a field of swords, all stuck into the earth blade-first. Every sword that has ever existed in any plane has a replica in this demiplane, which is under your control as long as you maintain Concentration.

As part of the initial casting action, and again on each of your subsequent turns while you maintain Concentration, you can use your action to command two blades of myth and legend to fly out of the ground and attack a target of your choosing before returning to the earth. Though they are considered melee attacks, the attack and damage rolls use your spellcasting ability modifier. Add your proficiency modifier to every attack roll regardless of your character's proficiencies.

For every attack made as part of this spell, roll on the table below to determine the weapon you summon. You must select the target before rolling for the sword. The attack benefits from every property the weapon has, as though you were attuned to it. All saving throws use your spell DC.

As the swords in the Plane of Blades come from all planes of existence, a sword may not necessarily have the same properties as a blade in a given plane that shares its name.

Mythical Weapons:

• 1: Blackrazor. Blackrazor is a +3 greatsword. If this attack reduces a creature to 0 hit points and it is not a construct or undead, you gain temporary hit points equal to the creature's maximum hit points.
• 2: Durandal. Durandal is a +3 longsword. Durandal deals an extra 1d10 force damage on a hit. If the target is a construct or made out of earth or rock, it deals an extra 3d10 force damage instead.
• 3: Joyeuse. Joyeuse is a +3 rapier. It makes two attacks with advantage on both.
• 4: Claíomh Solais. Claíomh Solais is a +3 shortsword. All damage dealt by Claíomh Solais is radiant damage. If Claíomh Solais strikes a target that has an external source of power (e.g. a lich's phylactery), Claíomh Solais first deals damage to the target, then deals double that damage to the external source of power, regardless of location or planar differences.
• 5: Masamune. Masamune is a +3 longsword. Its long, curved edge is perfect for slashing multiple enemies in one stroke. You can attack up to 2 additional enemies with Masamune, using the same attack and damage rolls for each, as long as all targets are in adjacent spaces.
• 6: Balmung. Balmung is a +3 greatsword. If the target is a dragon, Balmung deals an additional 10d6 damage.
• 7: Excalibur. Excalibur is a +3 longsword. When Excalibur damages an enemy, it deals an additional 2d10 radiant damage, and all creatures hostile to you within 20 feet of the target must make a Constitution saving throw or be blinded for one minute.
• 8: Grasscutter. Grasscutter is a +3 shortsword. Its swing sends waves of razor-sharp wind through the air. Each creature in a 60-foot cone facing a direction determined by you and centered on the target must make a Dexterity saving throw or take 4d6 force damage, taking half as much damage on a successful save. If Grasscutter's melee attack hits, the target automatically fails the saving throw.
• 9: Craven Edge. Craven Edge is a +3 greatsword. When Craven Edge damages a creature that is not a construct or undead, that creature must make a Constitution saving throw or have 2 points drained from its Strength score. Those points are added to your Strength score until your next short or long rest. Creatures brought to 0 Strength in this manner are slain.
• 10: Oberon. Oberon is a +3 rapier. It deals an additional 1d8 psychic damage. A fiend, fey, or celestial damaged by Oberon must make a Wisdom saving throw or be paralyzed for 1 minute.
• 11: Shamshir. Shamshir is a +3 scimitar. Shamshir does an extra 5d6 force damage to fiends, and a target that takes damage from Shamshir has its magic negated. It can not cast spells or benefit from magic items or abilities until the start of your next turn.
• 12: Aejax. Unlike the other items in the Plane of Blades, Aejax is an impenetrable shield. If you summon Aejax, you do not make an attack, but are immune to all damage until the start of your next turn.

When the duration of the spell ends or your Concentration fades, all creatures are returned to the material plane approximately where they were in the Plane of Blades, relative to their original positions (i.e., if they moved in the Plane of Blades from their starting location, apply that movement to the material plane.) If this would cause a creature to appear inside a wall, terrain, other object, or another creature, they appear next to it instead.

Recommended music for the duration of the spell.

Image copyright Type-Moon, Studio DEEN