Sheldon Catley
Table of Contents
I
We Are Dorkis
Chapter I: We Are Dorkis
We Are Dorkis
Once upon a time, there was a dork by the online pseudonym 'Fccview' who made a tweet about wanting to create a fun project. Against all odds, a heroine called 'Tori' got in touch via DM and, because fccview knew she had incredible artistic skills, he agreed right away.
Not long after, a coding prince called 'Frank' also sent our dork a private message. He explained he had more than 20 years of coding experience. Which makes him the oldest dork in the team!
Dorkis are dorks, goofballs and weirdos, created the old-fashioned way with pen and colored pencil on paper, scanned and edited to make 4724 randomly generated Dorkis.
Each Dorkis character is a colorful, unique and weird avatar, with randomly selected hair, eyes, body and more.
Our small team is a bunch of NFT dorks dedicated to NFTs and the NFT community. We're building an inclusive and diverse society - celebrating what makes us all unique dorks.
This book is our delve into 5th Edition Dungeons and Dragons. You will find all the information you need to create and play within the world of Dorkland, including character options for creating your own Dorki adventurer.
‘Dorkland: Fractured Worlds’
Lead Writer and Book Design – Sheldon Catley
Book Cover and Interior Art - Fueld_and_briefd
Additional Art – Tori Batt
Page Textures - /u/flamableconcrete
‘We Are Dorkis’ Project
CEO - FCCView, the 'Metal Merchant'
CTO - Frank, 'THE Wizard'
Artist Lead– Tori Batt, the 'Mad Hermit'
Lore Master – Sheldon Catley, the ‘Grave Warden’
Design Lead - KRD, Master of the 'White Wolf'
Chief Marketing Officer - Wendy, the "Director of Whispers"
Community Manager - T3D, the "Jack-in-the-box"
Jr. Community Manager - Squiggly, the "Love Dragon"
Friend of Dorkis - JLmaxcy, the 'Archon of Lore'
II
Prologue
Chapter II: Prologue
Have you ever wondered what your Dorkis does when you aren't staring at them lovingly in your wallet?...
What adventures and shenanigans happen behind that brightly lit computer screen, under all that squiggly code?...
A Dorkis' loves, wants and dreams? What they prefer for breakfast, and what their favourite breed of cat is?
…
What-what do you mean, 'No'?
Euhm, well, alright then. Let’s just, for a moment, assume you have wondered!
They do all these things, and more! And they do them all in this magical, weird, dorkish place known as...
Dorkland
No, seriously. Dorkland.
It's, uh, the name we went for...
Anyway… roll the title crawl!
Oh, this is going into a book? Well, uh, I guess just turn the page then? Less spectacular and all that, but hey, what do I know?
I havnt said enough to even fill one page?
Oh.
Uh...
Dorkland
The Denizens of Dorkland lived a peaceful, idyllic life without fear or discomfort.
The calm oasis of Dorkland was shattered by the arrival of an enigmatic eldritch being, known only as 'Sikrod', bringing with him evil and monsters.
A tide of creatures, full of fangs, claws, horns, and wings crashed into the land following in Sikrod's wake, led by his emissaries, Evil Clones of Dorkland's inhabitants.
Dorkis from across the land have begun to take up arms and train as adventurers to fight off the monsters and corruption brought to Dorkland by Sikrod. Adventurer Guilds have sprung up and act as hubs for these Dorkis to congregate, accepting bounties, jobs and quests from their Guild Masters to aid the people of Dorkland against Sikrod's Influence.
Sikrod's arrival shattered more than the physical world, however, and parallel versions of Dorkland have begun to seep into each other as Plane Rifts swallow up whole towns, regions, and Dorkis!
One Week, you may find yourself questing with a completely different group of Dorkis, another you may find yourself in a region where a previously completed quest was failed and have to deal with the consequences.
Either way, all Dorkis have the same shared goal. Grow in strength, aid the Denizens of Dorkland and find out how to defeat Sikrod. They'll have to travel the length and breadth of Dorkland to do it, but once they finish their Journey, they will become Heroes of Legend.
III
The World of Dorkland
The Isle of Left Shoes
Capitol: Clogside
Magic: Arcane (Wizards and Artificers) - Arcane Magic comes from study and careful application of the rules of Magic to gain the desired effect.
Known For: The Best in Fashion, Exotic Quinine, Leather armour and Unique Leather weapons
This Island Nation is strange and quite unusual, even for those within Dorkland. Most refer to those who live there as "Islanders" and the Nation as "The Isle".
The Dorkis of the Isle are stoic and hard-working folk. They are less eccentric and bubbly than most of their kin and subsist on a diet almost entirely made up of Leather (Yes, you read that right), the whole nation in fact is literally built on the back of the leather.
Leather food, leather homes, leather armour and weapons, even leather hoes! But, "How?" you may ask? Or, most likely, "Why?" well, oh reader, allow me to explain...
While the nation's chief exports are shoes and other leather goods, they rear no cattle and otherwise obtain their leather through no ordinary means. Some quirk of magic or perhaps a long forgotten curse or something else entirely has rendered the earth and soil of this Island into leather.
Dorkis Cultivate and Farm this leather from the land as others would crops, ensuring the correct amount of light and water gets to their fields. However, the best, most supple, most tasty leather is only found if you dig deep enough for it.
There are large mining operations all over the island (called Leather Bores) which burrow deep into the ground.
One side effect of all the leather in the economy is a booming clothing and fashion industry. When the lights go down in the cities of the isle, fashion shows of all calibre rage on throughout the night, with the wildest and craziest of designs brought to life by magic and craftsmanship.
The Isle is all sweat, frowns, and hard work in the day. Then sweat, dance and fashion during the night.
What's in a name?
Oh, and why is it known as the 'Isle of Left Shoes' I hear you ask? I suppose you'll just have to visit and find out for yourself.
Just... don't ask it too loudly...
Cities and Locals
Clogside
The city is all catwalks and clothing stores. Anything and everything can be bought here. At Night, the Stoic Dorkis of the Isle change into their evening wear and begin the daily attempt to razzle and dazzle their friends and colleagues.
The Leather Pits
The Largest Leather mining operation on the Isle and the source of the most sought-after raw materials.
There are, however, a lot of unsettling rumours about the place. Some say deep in the longest bores, you can hear whispers in your head, of a strange low humming coming from even deeper down. Always out of reach, always deeper...
Instep Farm
One of the largest farms on the Isles, they cultivate the land and harvest with secret techniques which produce some of the finest leather available in Dorkland
Leatherback Wood
The Trees of this Woodland, like much of the Isle, are made of Leather. The trunks are smooth and hard to the touch, and the leaves heavy.
The Fauna here eat the leather and have grown more like the trees, growing strange leathery protrusions on their bodies.
Valley of Laces
The leather in the Lace Valley grows differently from the rest of the island. It’s stringy and grows up the sides of the valley like vines. It is harvested for thread and bindings
The Ring
Strange stone ruins in the shape of a ring on the secondary Isle. Some believe they are connected to the other Stone rings found around Dorkland, but they appear to be inert and just simple stones
The River of Soles
Much less ominous than it sounds, the River of Soles runs east to west across the Isle of Left Shoes, and carries neither sole nor soul!
The river acts as the waste disposal mechanism for the largest Shoe Factory in all of Dorkland, and is 90% discarded waste leather.
The river is more solid than liquid, and on a hot day, young Dorkis have been known to play on it, as it slowly slides to the east and west, groaning and sloshing.
There's a lot of magic up in that factory, however, and while the material in the river is mostly made of waste product, there is enough ambient energy flowing through to occasionally animate a Shoe Golem. But, that's no worry (It is), as they're harmless! (They're not).
The Desert of Dessert
Capitol: Rathma
Magic: Primal (Druids, Rangers and Sorcerers) - Primal Magic is channelled through the elements and the natural world.
Known for: Abundance of bizarre living foods, Centre of Art of Culture, Powerful residual Magics.
The Desert of Dessert. The land of Sand, Snow, Puns and treats for all. The Land is Hot and cold and seeped in powerful magics from ages past.
One of the more esoteric regions of Dorkland, the Desert of Dessert is almost entirely edible. The sand, rocks, water, flora and fauna are entirely made from sweets and desserts of various types.
Nobody is quite sure how it happened. Some say it’s a quirk of magic, others a curse or blessing upon the land. Either way, you can find cacti made of licorice, shrubs made of cheesecake, stones made of wafer and so much more.
Due to the bizarre nature of the region and the magic that permeates the land, the dunes have a near liquid-like quality to them, shifting and flowing like a great sea. The Dorkis that live in the desert traverse it on specialised Sand Skiffs and any travellers that wish to walk must do so with specialised shoes, lest they risk sinking below.
Rathma sits in the centre of the desert, surrounded by an arctic vortex and in the depths of a perpetual blizzard. The snow itself is ice-cold, in contrast to the heat of the desert; this opposition causes a band of greenery and life that rings the two regions.
Due to the abundance of food within the desert, the Dorkis who live there do not practice farming or hunting as a rule, and so they have much more spare time than Dorkis of other lands. This gives them time to be extra creative and inventive, and Rathma is a centre of artistic and scientific innovation!
Cities and Locals
Rathma
Capital of the Desert of Dessert. Rathma resides in the centre of a polar vortex and its Dorkis are well accustomed to the cold. The halls of this city are old and magic permeates every inch of the place. Some say the city was pulled from the Great Shelf to the north, aeons ago, with some powerful spell.
Others just think that perhaps the gods thought it would be funny to have snow in the sandy desert.
Bitterbite Pass
Dorkis cyclops are native to the various mountainous regions of Dorkland. They're mostly found in the Rascal Peaks and the Bitterbite Spine. They prefer cold climates and have this love/hate relationship with Dragons.
You see, the Dragons of Bitterbite are pretty jealous types and hate to have others around that may take up the attention, they shun them all over. That said, the Cyclops' whole culture is based around Dragon Scale. Instead of hunting or fighting them, they tend to them, making sure their needs are met and in return, the Dragons bestow their lost scales on them.
The Boiling Wilds
This patch of dunes and sand is particularly dangerous! As well as trying to slowly suck everything down to the depths below, the sand in this Region is also super-hot!
Sandyfloss
Like almost all towns and cities in the desert, Sandyfloss sits on the coast. However, unlike the other towns in the region, Sandyfloss is built entirely from its namesake and all the buildings float in the air! They have Dorkis whose special job is to make sure they all stay tethered to the ground.
Lemonade Oasis
This area of reprieve in the desert is full of lemonade, this does however attract a lot of attention from local predators and unaware Dorkis may find themselves on the menu of a hungry Brownie Bear or Custard Cockroach.
The Storm Plains
This rocky outcrop to the south of the Desert is atop an enormous cliff that few ever risk climbing. Upon this wide, flat space, a perpetual storm rages and howling winds, strong enough to lift Dorkis, rage.
Echoing Gulf
This gulf is well known for its fantastic acoustics, with sounds and noise sometimes echoing and bouncing around for hours! Some say it has something to do with strange sunken magic devices or perhaps some joke from the gods.
Food, food everywhere, but not a bite to eat.
Did you know that, even though most things in the Desert of Dessert are made from food, that they're often quite inedible? Turns out it's pretty difficult to grab a bite from a Raging Raviotter.
Kingdom of Greater Dork
Capitol: Dorkelot
Magic: Divine (Clerics and Paladins) - Divine Magic users gain their powers from the Gods and Goddesses of the world, granting them the power of Miracles.
Known for: Dragons, vast dungeons full of magic and treasure, Adventure Guilds
The Kingdom of Greater Dork, magic, adventure and glory await those who travel its lands. The region is full of castles, dungeons, princesses and Dragons!
The Kingdom is ruled over by its Queen and her Knights from the city of Dorkelot. The knights are well versed in questing and have a fanatical drive and need to help those less fortunate than themselves.
The Kingdom is the centre of the Adventurer Guilds in Dorkland. Wannabe Heroes come from all over to join up and go out on quests, and adventures and to make legends of themselves.
Now, this all sounds fantastic, but it has led to a sharp decline in general evil and the like in the region. This, in turn, has led to the creation of various nefarious guilds in opposition to the Adventure guilds who go out on quests to cause trouble. It’s all very complex.
As well as Adventurers, the lands are also regularly terrorized by its native Dragon population. They come sweeping in on towns, villages, and cities breathing fire, ice, and lightning. They leave nothing but destruction in their wake, seeming to only care about collecting gold, crystals and treasure to bring back to their hoards.
Dragons & Dungeons
Pfft, who would actually want to fight dragons and plunder dungeons, right...?
When Dragons attack, the various Guilds set aside their differences and band together to defend the land. There are treaties in place that even temporarily pardon the villainous guilds so that they may help push back the dragon attacks.
One, frankly bizarre, oddity of this region is its dungeons. These ancient holds and ruins promise riches and glory to those brave enough to plunder them. While this is all par for the course, the oddity is that these dungeons appear to not only replenish the creatures and treasures within but, to actually be sentient beings in their own right that encourage adventures.
Cities and Locals
Fomo
A Village where everyone wants to be because it’s where everyone wants to be. But... nobody is quite sure why, but it doesn’t matter! Because anyone who is anyone is here, and you can’t miss out on... whatever it is!
Onyx
Town on the steppes of Obsidian Overlook, a dormant volcano. They grow magical herbs and reagents in the soil and provide a lot of the needed ingredients for spells and potions to the rest of the Kingdom
Mount Fireball
This Volcano is brand new! It sprung up as part of the turmoil of Sikrod’s arrival and covered the surrounding area in lava! It also destroyed the local town of Pinecrag. There are a lot of Dorkis grumpy about this, as Pinecrag was the source of the best crumpets in all of Dorkland)
Phase Town
This town shifts in and out of the Ethereal plane randomly. There one day and gone the next! These Dorkis often embrace their life of random chaos and this is exhibited throughout the city in its architecture.
Maw of Aris
The Maw is a massive supervolcano that sits off the south coast of the Kingdom. Some small settlements have sprung up on the slopes of it in the last few years, but these have largely been failures. The Maw is largely believed to be the entrance to Aris’ Domain.
Aschering
One of the many stone ring ancient sites around Dorkland. Nobody is entirely sure if they are all linked or share some unknown purpose. The Aschering appears to have once been the site of a magic battle, and wisps of magical energy live in the charred, blackened ground around it.
Olympus Sanatorium
This is where Dorkis go to get better when they often suffer madness due to time spent lost in the Shroud. It is a place of healing, and many adventurers that pass the area visit to get their Dorki heads patched up.
Moonshine Plateau
This barren stretch of ground sits near the elven city of Praesidium. The only sign of life here is an enormous tree sprouting from the centre. Its leaves are the colour of moonlight and, during a full moon, the plateau blooms to life with magical flowers.
Sanctum Imperium
Capital - Axiom
Magic: Divine (Clerics and Paladins) - Divine Magic users gain their powers from the Gods and Goddesses of the world, granting them the power of Miracles.
Known for: Gods, Cults, Warfare and Siegecraft
Sanctum Imperium lies north of the Desert of Dessert and is largely cut off and isolated from most of Dorkland by the Rascal Peaks. Their culture and customs have thus developed along a slightly different track to most.
They are isolationist and rarely allow visitors or travellers into their lands without good cause, zealously guarding their borders. The Border Guards are swift to act and do so with powerful Divine Magics, as Dorkis from the Imperium are the most devout in all of Dorkland.
They revere the entire pantheon in the Imperium, with the larger cities having shrines and temples to all the prime gods, as well as dozens of the lesser ones.
However, as it tends to be, with all these Gods and their conflicting sentiments, strife and War is common in the Imperium with sects, denominations and cults all fighting for dominance.
Warcraft and Siege Engines are an integral part of daily life, with enite schools and universities dedicated to the craft. On almost any day, you will see wargames and mock battles being carried out.
There are a holy few known as 'Omnitheists' who worship all gods and believe that every deity, big or small, has their place. It is the Omnitheists who rule the Imperium
War! What is it good for?
A whole lot, apparently. These Sanctum Dorkis cant get enough of it!
Cities and Locals
Axiom
The Holy city of Truth, Axiom, is the capital of the Sanctum. Here you will find temples to all the gods of Dorkland with worship throughout. The armouries of the Armamentari are also rumoured to lie hidden beneath its streets.
Witch Wood
These woods are haunted. This is known for a fact. Do not enter the Witch Wood. You do not want to come here. Leave now while you are still able. This is not a threat, this is a promise.
Rascal Peaks
These strange mountains can be heard whispering in the wind when the day is quiet. They often talk about silly things, like pulling pranks on adventurers, causing landslides or keeping villagers awake at night. They are insufferable.
Sanctus Ignis
One of the five Elemental towers of the Imperium, magic users from this nation channel energy from these towers to power their spells.
Sanctum Ignis channels the power of fire, wild and dangerous. The other towers channel Water, Air and Earth with the fifth, ruined tower channeling an as yet, unknown magic.
Sola Petra
The lone peak, the only mountain within the lands of the Imperium (other than the Rascal peaks at their Border). The stone and rocks of this mountain are unlike any other in Dorkland, being seemingly indestructible. Many have tried to mine them, using magic and machine but not even specks of dust roll off this peak.
The peak stands tall within the Imperium, rooted by incredible powers of magic, a reminder to all Dorkis of the power of the gods.
Animus
One of the larger cities of the Imperium, Animus is well known for its ties to magic and is the location of the most prestigious magic school in the land. Citizens tend to look the other way at all the Necromancy that happens, after all, magic is good for the city!
The Custodes
These enigmatic statues depict two warriors locked in battle. Many Dorkis come here to settle disputes and fight friendly duels. But the true purpose of their construction is long lost to Dorki history.
Frigora Virgo
This giant tree of ice stands resolute out on the ice fields north of the Imperium. It was once part of a project to bring life, using magic, to the barren ice. But it failed for unknown reasons.
Thats it! You're Grounded!
At least, thats what some Dorkis will tell you, about how the Rascal Peaks came into being. Apparently they annoyed Idros, God of the earth, so utterly and thoroughly that he spoke for the first time in Eons and 'Grounded' them.
The Shroud
Capital: No centralised government, lots of independent homesteads/towns
Magic: Occult (Warlock, Bard and Sorcerer) - Occult magic is old, drawing on Eldritch Knowledge, rituals and the dead.
Known for: Undead 'live' among the living, Links to the 'Wilds', crafted natural goods like wooden armour or leaf-bladed swords
The Shroud is a general name for the Swamps and Boggy area of Dorkland to the south-east of the continent. It is not a full-fledged country like the Kingdoms.
It has this name for two reasons. Firstly, the area is covered in a thin layer of mist. The mists are often quite tame, but do sometimes flare up and strangle the region. Secondly, the veil between our world and 'The Wilds' is very thin here, with both regions overlapping and the influence of this strange place bleeds over.
'The Wilds' is the home of the Fae. While the two places are connected, it is not a simple matter of walking from one to the other. The paths and routes between the two areas are vast and complex as the Fae themselves.
Sometimes it may require a person to walk backward over a specific tree stump while saying their name on the second full moon of the month. Sometimes a person needs to get truly lost in the mists, and then declare out loud that they are lost while lying in a patch of freshly grown moss.
Much of the Fae-like nature of 'The Wilds' bleeds over into the land; Dorkis of the shroud shun manufactured goods and are unkind to strangers who bring such things into their communities, especially those who bring iron with them.
Their Towns and Villages are grown from trees and water as 'Whisperers' speak magical words into seeds, saplings and ponds. These 'Whisperers' are venerated members of Shroud communities, often leading and guiding them.
It is not unusual for travellers to become lost and slip into the Wilds while in the Shroud. Most do not realise what has happened and simply believe themselves to be lost. Others, however, can sometimes be tempted to cross by more malevolent Fae. Those who return are not the same, often having aged drastically in a short time (Or not ageing at all after being lost for years).
Every Dorkis born in the Shroud has some magical ability, it is common and powerful in these lands, and is used to deal with most mundane tasks. The most common ritual is the binding of lesser spirits to bodies of the recently deceased.
Shroud Dorkis believe that just because a Dorkis soul has departed, it does not mean that the body cannot still serve the community. Undead are common in all areas of the shroud. You'll find them fulfilling the most physical and mundane tasks of communities, as well as manning their defences and working as guards against creatures and miscreants.
Life Goes On
Thats right, within the Shroud, the dead are never truly dead. Dorkis use magic to keep those bodies going and going!
Cities and Locals
Yggdrasil
The Great Tree. It grows in the depths of the swamps in the Shroud and exists across both the Prime Plane and the Plane of the Fae (The Wilds).
It is the source of most of the magical shenanigans across the 'Shroud', granting those who travel to it and take a branch of great power.
It's not easy to get to though; the swamps and forests of the 'Shroud' actively defend it from people with Ill intent
Cackling Wood
Many Dorkis who visit the area speak of getting lost, of moving trees and roving witches. The area does actually have a particularly bad Witch infestation, but at this point, it’s just easier to leave them to it, less Dorkis turned into toads that way.
Clovernest
One of the largest, permanent, settlements of Dorkis within the Shroud is Clovernest. Clovernest is built up and around the trees in the area and is all but invisible to those who do not know to look for it.
Aridleaf
One of the branches of the great tree, these foci sprout at the edges of the Shrouds influence and grant Dorkis the right know-how and the ability to transport themselves to other parts of the world! Aridleaf is said to be connected to the Desert.
The Twins
This pair of stone towers jut out of the land. Dorki archaeologists have explored the area and surrounding ground and have revealed the existence of a skull and skeleton of an unknown creature deep underground, with its fangs sticking out.
Shroudmouth Isles
This isle lies within the delta of The Shroud, while they are depicted on maps, they constantly shift position and are where the veil to the Wilds is the thinnest. Odd, Fae creatures reside here and strange ruins dot the land.
The Ruptured Archipelago
Capital: Kymar
Magic: Primal (Druids, Rangers and Sorcerers) - Primal Magic is channelled through the elements and the natural world
Known for: Dinosaurs, Nomadic Flotillas, Ancient Ruins, and Giant and unusual Creatures.
Nobody is quite sure why the land here is 'ruptured', it stands to reason that something had to have happened here, probably long ago. The area is known as the "Ark" to locals, mostly due to the region's proclivity to things of the long-forgotten past.
The Dorkis that live here are wild and free-spirited. Most are nomadic, moving from island to island in flotillas of repurposed ships as the seasons change. There are several cities in the region, but most are nothing more than glorified trading outposts.
Perhaps the most stand-out feature of the region is the roaming dinosaur population. These unique animals are seemingly extinct across the rest of Dorkland, but appear to thrive in the Ark.
Most of the other Fauna are similar beasts to that of the rest of Dorkland, but with unusual twists! Giant wasps terrorize the coasts, packs of killer penguin-bears haunt the seas and flights of Razorbacks roam the skies!
The land here is old, older than it has any right to be. Where the Ark meets the Kingdom of Greater Dork, there is a large mountainous spine, suggesting this region was not always at the location it is now.
Pointless!
Some of these notes are pointless! (or are they?)
There is little in the way of industry or government in the Ark. Most of the tribes govern themselves and are only concerned with what they need to get by. That said, sometimes when there is a dispute between tribes a council of Elders is formed in the city of Kymar to settle it.
Councils are rare and only convened in the face of the direst of conflicts. They mandate that all tribes dock at Kymar and the oldest male and female of each tribe will sit and resolve the issue.
Cities and Locals
Kymar
Kymar is an ancient city that has stood for longer than any recorded history of the area. The city is made almost completely of brass and steel, rising up into the sky in banded rings or 'levels' as the Dorkis who live here refer to them.
Kymar seems to have initially been built for creatures much larger than the average Dorki, as all the doorways and halls are enormous. However, there seems to be nothing left of those who used to dwell here, and the City belongs to the Dorkis of the Ark now.
Sauria
A City, of Dinosaurs! I mean… I don’t think this needs much more of an explanation, how cool is that?
Seriously though, this whole place is the Dino-Capital of the Ark. Here you'll find Dinosaurs working in all walks of life. Dino-Bakers, Dino-Artists and even Dino-Paleontologists!
Hazar Gate
Ancient gate that spans two of the Islands in the Ark. Nobody is quite sure what its purpose is, but it looks cool!
Many Dorkis superstitiously believe that sailing under it brings back luck. They'll even chart longer courses around the gate so that they dont ever lay eyes on it!
Honeycomb Bay
Run away from this place if you stumble on it, the giant bees have been known to carry off errant Dorkis who aren’t paying attention!
Sparkling Shore
These sands glisten and shine under the sun, with multiple dazzling colours. There are thousands and thousands of little tiny gems littering the area.
Fractured Forest
This forest once occupied the same space, but some event long ago broke the land in the Ark. This forest was forever broken.
The Depths
These cracked areas of land lead deep down into a complex cave network. The only light in these tunnels is that given off by the glowing flora and shimmering wisps that zip around.
Frostfall
This lake is perpetually frozen all year round; the ice is hard as steel and clear as glass. Some say that an old being lives deep below, slumbering and frozen and that one day, when the ice finally melts, they will fly free over Dorkland.
Dinosaurs!
And did you know, these aren’t like the dinosaurs that you and I know. Oh no! The Dinosaurs of The Ark are intelligent creatures with their own culture. They even live together with the Dorkis!
Sikrod's Domain
Sikrod's holdings, within Dorkland. This area is dark, evil and corrupted. It also holds the only known portal to the 'Nether Lands'. This is where Sikrod broke through into Dorkland and his corruption has been steadily spreading ever since.
Strangely, nobody is quite sure what used to occupy this land. Sikrod’s arrival is fairly recent, but his very presence seems to warp the very fabric of reality under his influence.
This is the most dangerous area of Dorkland, no adventurer has thus far returned from passing into this land, but stories and rumours have begun to spread talking of vast treasures and powerful artefacts within.
Locals
The Nether Rift
The portal that brought Sikrod to this world, is a wound and scar that seems to continually seep into the land and spread its corruption. Some say, if you fling yourself in, you will step out into the Nether World.
The Citadel
Vampire Dorkis are not originally native to Dorkland; they come from the Dark North. They are warped and cursed by the strange energy and Magics found there. Some turn feral and roam the wilds based on nothing but instinct.
Most, however, have retained their intelligence and banded together to form a Vampire court hidden away from the eyes of mortal Dorkis. It’s from their court that the Vampires (And Royal Vampires) live and plot.
The Well of Eternity
The well arrived with Sikrod, but... The well has also always been there...? It exists throughout all recorded Dorki history and appears on every map of the area. But… it arrived with Sikrod, didn’t it?
Fudder’s Bay
Grumpy Pirates who doubt and spread fear, this is where many Evil Dorkis make their homes, and it is not a pleasant place to be. Watch out!
Super Haunted Wood
These woods aren’t actually haunted. There was just a recent, very good, PR campaign to make Dorkis believe that. You should absolutely come to visit; it’s very safe and full of fun things to do!
The Lab
This is where Sikrod’s creatures flood out into the land, mad scientists work day and night to conjure up increasingly more and more monstrous concoctions.
Shhhsh, he can see you
Be very quiet. Sikrod is watching. He is always watching.
IV
Pantheon and Guilds
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Chapter IV: Pantheon and Guilds
The Gods of Dorkland
There are minor gods to most things in the world; these usually focus on one minimal facet (like a Minor god of toe stubbing).
There are 9 Major Deities, however, that cover vast domains. The Gods themselves often have multiple avatars and are generally beyond the constructs of what we know of gender.
That said, some are seen in a more feminine light and others more masculine, while others fall in the spectrum of other attributes in between and beyond.
There are also older gods, ones who have been active in the other planes of the world long before the arrival of the current primary pantheon. Some of these are also listed below, but they are much less well-known within the world.
| Deity | Alignment | Usual Domains |
|---|---|---|
| The Overdork | Neutral Good | Life, Peace, Twilight |
| Aris | Lawful Good | Grave Light, War |
| Yatark | Chaotic Good | Tempest, Forge, Trickery |
| Sk'Net | True Neutral | Knowledge, Arcana |
| Idros | Lawful Neutral | Order, Peace, Forge |
| Aen | Chaotic Neutral | Nature, Grave, Life |
| The Shaper | Neutral Evil | Life, Knowledge, Forge |
| Raktix | Chaotic Evil | Nature, Tempest, Twilight |
| Thaneria | Lawful Evil | Death, Trickery, War |
The Overdork
The Overdork is the patron saint of Dorkis and an advocate for their care and fair treatment; they appear as a chimaera-like creature with an owl's head.
They are one of the most present gods in Dorkland, often appearing in their Owl avatar to Dorkis in times of need. Due to this, they also have the largest number of Dorki followers and the biggest representation within the temples and homes of Dorkland.
The Overdork is sometimes scorned by some Dorkis for being too pervasive. They argue that they should be allowed to stand or fall on their own, without somebody constantly hovering around and trying to wrap them in wool. After all, how can they grow without first falling?
Those Dorkis who follow the Overdork often find themselves in positions of hospitality and care, with designs to change the world for the better.
Aris (ah-riss)
Aris is the God of Fire, Curiosity and the Dawns. She most often takes the form of a Cat with fur that looks like the stars.
She is perhaps the most alien of the gods, being something more primal and instinctual. Not only that, but she has little understanding of the Dorkis and creatures of the world and does not involve herself with worship or followers.
Her domain is said to be the ‘World Soul’, the very centre of the planet itself.
She embodies the fire at the heart of all beings, both literally and metaphysically. Her avatars can sometimes be spotted observing Dorki society from afar, head tilted to the side and seemingly deep in thought.
She takes a dim view of the undead. Life is fire, bright, burning, and full of potential. Undeath perverts this on a base level, and her usual warming, curious light quickly turns to rage and cinder in their presence.
Those Dorkis who follow Aris often hunt the un-dead but are also kind, caring individuals who seek to understand the wider world.
Holier than thou?
Things are not always as they seem with the Gods of Dorkland. For instance, many consider Aris a Good god, but from the perspective of Dorkis from the Shroud? She is one of the most evil there are.
Yatark (Ya-tar-ck)
Yatark is the God of Luck, Lightning and Trade. They most often take the form of crackling balls of energy which zip through the air, akin to Will-o-wisps.
Yatark is another of the elemental gods of Dorkland, embodying the chaotic power of lightning. Their fast, fractured nature leads them to those Dorkis who are thrill-seekers and gamblers.
Their domain is the ever-moving ‘Voltaic Concourse ‘, a comet trapped in Dorkland’s Gravitational pull.
While generally seen as benevolent, Yatark straddles the line of good-neutral because, as luck will do, sometimes they unpredictably turn. Yatark seems to seek the chaos caused by last-minute changes in fortune (both favourable and unfavourable) and their little crackling orbs are often worn as emblems by Dorkis in need of luck.
They have the most varied rituals and blessings of all the Gods (More, in fact, than all the others combined) as each Dorki follower inevitably develops their own unique ritual.
Those Dorkis who follow Yatark worship at personal altars, carry good luck charms and spread the chaos of luck into the world.
Sk'Net (skah-net)
Sk'Net is God of Knowledge and knowledge alone. They exist for nothing more or less than the absolute collection of all things past present and future.
None of the Nine Prime Gods worshipped in Dorkland is more enigmatic than Sk'Net. They have many followers and Clerics about Dorkland, yet they have the least influence in the world.
Their domain is known as the 'Astral Library', and it is here that they store the font of all collected knowledge, brought to them by their followers. The Library is much sought after by scholars, sages and nerdowells.
They seemingly want for nothing more than this singular goal. Although, there are some Dorkis who posit the question, “Will Sk’Net still be content if all knowledge is collected, what then?”
Sk'net's followers facilitate a magical network that connects the Dorkis and nations of Dorkland (And its Fractured counterparts!) it allows communication and transmissions to travel at the speed of magic.
Knowledge is Power
Sk'net is thought by many, due to the vast amounts of knowledge they have collected, to be one of the most powerful gods in all of Dorkland . Perhaps, if Sk'Net were so inclined, they could even match Sikrod's power.
Idros (id-ross)
Idros is the god of order, earth and eternity. He often takes the form of a stone statue of an old man. It’s said, those who come across these statues will often see the faces of lost loved ones delicately carved into them.
Another of the elemental gods, Idros embodies the stoic nature of Rock and Stone and is often evoked in matters of law and contract. He is also considered the partner of Aen.
His domain is deep within the Fang Mountains, a citadel of stone carved into the peaks known as the 'Precipice of Perpetuity'.
It is often said that Idros was happier before Dorkis, before Dorkland or even the universe. When it was quiet and calm. However, he has always been here and always will be, and he is patient.
Those Dorkis who follow Idros seek to bring balance and calm to the chaos of the world and can be found in offices of law, as constables or even as soldiers.
Joined for all time
There are some who follow both Idros and Aen, together, as a single entity. They believe this is the true form of both gods, that they are each simply a sundered half of a greater whole. These Dorkis make it their mission to bring followers of both Gods, and even other Dorkis, together. Dorkland's own matchmakers!
Aen (ae-en)
Aen is the god of destiny, spirits and judgement. She often takes the form of a ghost like an old woman and is usually depicted as embracing the stone statues of Idros.
Aen seeks to guide Dorkis along their paths, whatever they may be, to help them realise their own true self and potential. This does not stop at death, however, as she also guides the spirits of Dorkis to their afterlife as well.
Her domain is said to lie under that of Idros’ but many Dorkis also claim she does not have one.
Aen has a tense relationship with the Undead. While they break the cycle of life, their souls have already passed on, and they require no further guidance. Their mindless husks tend to alter the flow of destiny, however.
Aen’s followers work, often with those of Idros, to keep balance in the worlds of life and death.
The Shaper
The Shaper is the god of life, creation and invention. Often depicted as a misshapen person covered in scars.
The Shaper is a creative genius on a quest to find the ultimate being by combining creatures and matter; the results are often dangerous experimental mutants. It’s been theorised by some that the Shaper may have had something to do with Sikrod’s arrival.
The Shaper has been known to steal people away in the night, only to return them the next day altered in some way. Some Dorkis return with cosmetic changes such as rabbit ears or fur, however, others can return changed more drastically, such as with extra limbs or new magical abilities.
Their domain, The Crucible, is far to the north, hidden buried beneath the Great Shelf.
Those who follow the Shaper practice altering their own bodies with magic and medicine, sometimes for the better but often for nefarious needs.
Raktix (rack-ticks)
Raktix is the god of water, plague and decay. His avatar is that of a snarling, ill-looking man leaning heavily on a cane.
Another of the elemental gods, Raktix embodies the steady, persistent element of water. Even the strongest stone eventually erodes to sand and the strongest Dorki eventually falls to disease or age.
His Domain, the Withering Abyss lies deep below the waves of the Sunken Sea. Some say there is an entirely submerged kingdom down in the dark around his domain.
Raktix is often seen as Idros’ antithesis, as they embody fundamentally opposing aspects and their followers are often at odds. Raktix seeks to bring about the end of all things living; he seeks the desolation and peace of a scoured, flooded world.
His followers all share an affinity for water and can be found in the swamps, deltas and areas of standing water all over Dorkland.
What is a God?
Are they divine creators? Did they achieve Godhood with spells or Ritual? Do they believe in a higher power than themselves, perhaps some God of God's? Is it enough to just be strong and powerful to name yourself a god, or do you perhaps, require followers and worshipers, to be known to all in the world?
Thaneria (than-ear-ee-ah)
Thaneria is the god of air, madness and death and rarely takes any other form other than a space devoid of all light.
She borders the line between evil – neutral. While most believe she has an inherent villainous nature about her, others see her as a part necessary to the cycle of life.
Her domain is the Armantine Necropolis, said to lie deep beneath the Ark.
She commands beings known as the Whispers, who are always present at the final moments of a Dorkis and charged with bringing their last words to their loved ones. These Whispers are often met with superstition and are seen as signs of ill-omen, however.
Thaneria is venerated by a select, brave few around Dorkland as those who stand her presence are often driven mad by its touch. Those with the willpower to maintain their mind however, are often granted powerful gifts.
Her sane followers often become Whisperers, moving about the world like the wind. Her mad followers tend to wander off into towns and villages and find themselves locked up more often than not.
The Winter Queen and Summer King
There is a tale told of a pair of ancient beings who embody the shifting seasons of Dorkland. The Winter Queen of the Unseelie Court and the Summer King of the Seelie Court.
Little evidence is forthcoming however, as the two 'Gods' largly only appear in childrens stories told to Dorkis in the Shroud.
"She is cold, remorseless and inevitable. Wherever she steps, the ground around her freezes and the air itself grows heavy. Beings in her presence are made all too aware of how fragile their mortality is, just by just laying eyes upon her."
"He is warm, kind and inevitable. Where he has been, all grows calm and content. Those in his presence remember the happiest times in their life. And become enthralled in those thoughts. Forever."
Needless to say, there is some debate around their actual existence. But they have been included for completeness sake.
The Creeping Dark
Every year, the black spot on the south-east horizon seeps ever closer. Every Dorki who sails out to meet it never returns. Even looking upon it for too long makes your head hurt.
Some say it wants desperately to meet us, to join us, to be like us.
The Guilds of Dorkland
Since the arrival of Sikrod, various adventuring guilds have sprung up to train and outfit Dorkis who wish to join the quest to bring him down.
Initially, this movement started within the Kingdom of Greater Dork. However, over a short space of time, every nation developed their own specailised Guild.
Below, you will find information on the six largest guilds throughout Dorkland.
The Dragonknights
Home Nation: Kingdom of Greater Dork
Gear Speciality: Dragon Scale armour, ancient artefacts and Exotic Weapons
Magic Speciality: Transmutation and Graviturgy
Job Speciality: Bodyguards, Dragon Hunters, Dungeon plunderers and treasure seekers
Dragonknights are outfitted with the spoils of their conquests. The strongest adorn Dragon Scale armour that grants them Draconic powers (Such as Flight and Elemental breaths!) Others wield exotic weapons plundered from ruins (such as Chain Blades, Scythes, Chakrams and Double-blades).
They specialise in fighting the Dragons that plague the Kingdom (some elite members have even tamed Dragons and use them as mounts) as well as protecting the denizens of the land from all sorts of monster threats.
They also spend a lot of time pillaging and looting ancient sites around Dorkland on a nearly insatiable quest for gold and treasure, using this loot to further empower the guild members to hunt even stronger Dragons and delve even deeper into lost sites.
Its members are confident, brash leaders and adventurers.
The Sandgliders
Home Nation: Desert of Dessert
Gear Speciality: modified Bows, Crossbows, Light weapons and magical cloth/fabric armours
Magic Speciality: Divination and Abjuration
Job Speciality: Engineering, Exploring, Salvage
Sandgliders are outfitted primarily with specialised ranged weapons that have been augmented by the engineering prowess. They carry weapons such as Repeating Crossbows and Multi-shot Bows.
They use these weapons to keep their distance from the ravenous fauna of the Desert as well as to avoid (Where possible) leaving their Sand Skiffs.
The sand in the Desert of Dessert seems to perpetually flow down, so Sand Gliders who do disembark their Skiffs must be swift and light-footed.
Their armour and clothing are designed to repel the heat of the desert while helping keep its wearer hydrated. Their armours also often come with interdimensional spaces for pockets!
Sandgliders are master engineers (You only have to glance at a Sand Skiff to understand this) and construct wondrous machines. They use this expertise to scavenge the lands for lost technology and salvage parts and resources.
Its members are Curious, social and enigmatic problem-solvers.
The Whispering Tongues
Home Nation: Isle of Left Shoes
Gear Speciality: Leather based Medium and Heavy armour as well as Leather based Bludgeoning Weapons.
Magic Speciality: Chronurgy and Illusion
Job Speciality: Stealth, Espionage, Spying and Assassination
The Whispering tongues outfit their members with the latest in Leather gear. Leather Plate, Chain, Scale and even Leather Bludgeoning weapons (There is nothing quite like being hit with a Whispering Tongue's Great Hammer, the craftsmanship, the texture, the 'New Weapon' smell, the concussion).
This gear has a number of special properties, not least amongst them being their silent nature. For instance, Whispering Plate armour gives the wearer a Bonus to their Stealth instead of Plate armour's usual penalty, and a Whispering Mace gives the wielder an increased chance of knocking a target out.
This guild specialises in jobs that require subtlety, stealth and a keen eye. They are well known and recognised by their distinctive equipment, however, you often only spot one of its members because they want you too.
Its members are intelligent, calculated and furiously independent.
The Mistweavers
Home Nation: The Shroud
Gear Speciality: Mistweave Garments and Arcane Focus' imbued with power from the Wilds
Magic Speciality: Enchantment and Necromancy
Job Speciality: Artefact retrieval, Anti-Magic, Weapon and armour Enchantments
Mistweavers are all outfitted with their signature Mistweave garments. These clothes are enchanted by the powers of the Shroud and the Wilds, allowing them to shift form to almost anything the wearer might imagine (As well as a whole host of other magical benefits).
Mistweavers can often be distrusted by the other Guilds due to this shape shifting ability but they (usually) mean no ill will!
All Mistweavers have some affinity for magic, and they specialised in using it to shut down hostile magic. There is none a Bandit Hedge Wizard fears more than a Mistweaver Scion.
Mistweavers are also renowned for their ability to track, find and secure magical artefacts of great power. Also, while little known, their Necromantic abilities are also often used to heal the sick and wounded too.
Its members are bold, charismatic and power-hungry predators
The Mists of the Shroud
The Mists are a very tricky thing indeed. Some Dorkis have told tales of them seeming to whisper secrets in the night. Others have said they felt compelled to go out and walk through their densest parts.
The Armamentari
Home Nation: Sanctum Imperium
Gear Speciality: Explosives, Firearms, Elemental-infused Weapons
Magic Speciality: Abjuration and Evocation
Job Speciality: Demolition, Combat Training, Demon and Undead Slaying
The halls of the Armamentari are full of weapons from all corners of Dorkland, meticulously catalogued and ordered.
The Armamentari are an elite Holy order within the Sanctum Imperium. Their guild outfits its members with explosive ordinance, elemental infused weapons and Firearms.
Firearms are rare in Dorkland, with many having never seen one. They are, however, a destructive tool of war and the Armamentari embrace them due to this.
Armamentari weapons always do elemental damage (Lightning/Fire/Cold) and their specialised armour protects them from the elements in turn. Their gear clads them in protective suits of armour, inscribed with holy runes that sanctify the area around them and grant them boons when fighting Demons and Undead
The Armamentari mostly deploy to deal with Demon and Undead incursions, as well specialising in Demolition and Combat Training.
Its members are zealous, stubborn and loyal to a fault.
The Arkenaughts
Home Nation: The Ruptured Archipelago
Gear Speciality: Dinosaur Bone armour and Bladed weapons as well as Dinosaur Mounts
Magic Speciality: Evocation and Transmutation
Job Speciality: Couriers, Sailors, Tracking and Monster Hunting
Dorkis members of the Arkenaughts adorn themselves with armour and weapons born as gifts from their Dinosaur companions. These bones make for incredibly durable armour and devilishly sharp blades.
Arkenaughts specialise in fast-paced and high intensity jobs, such as bringing in outlaws and hunting monsters. Their arrival is often heralded by the dust clouds their Dinosaur mounts kick up as they speed across the Ark.
They are also competent sailors, often piloting the Flotillas that travel the waters of the ark. Anywhere you visit, an Arkenaught has surely been already, and they almost certainly did it with more speed and flair than you could imagine.
Its members are free-spirited, loud and outgoing thrill-seekers.
V
The Wider World
Chapter V: The Wider World
Armamentari Almanac of Armaments
Star of Aris
This morning star is commonly found amongst those who worship Aris, the mother of the Dawns, purifier of the undead. It can be used for both bludgeoning and piercing attacks, making use of its unique set of barb-like spikes and pointed top.
Practically speaking, the weapon is used to pull down unarmoured foes by the barbs, then dispatch them with a swift hit from the point. It is exceedingly effective against the slow, shambling undead of Sikrod's domain and allows a single well-trained Dorkis to take on large numbers of them alone.
All in all, we rate this weapon 6/10 for general use (It suffers against armoured foes!) but a 9/10 for undead slaying.
Just a Sword, Sword
This style of Sword is often utilised by the Armamentari themselves. While they are often known for their elaborate and multi-function weapons to suit multiple creatures and situations, the Just a Sword, Sword is just that. A sharpened length of metal with which to stab or slash something. A Sword.
It is particularly mundane, and really just a sword. Really. However, due to its extreme mundane-ness they are often used in areas of dense hostile magic, as they have proven to be almost unaffected by spells and effects that attempt to transmute matter or warp reality, acting as an anchor and mundane focal point.
At the end of the day, this weapon is just an everyday, average sword, we rate it 3/10 for general use but 9/10 when dealing with forces that would seek to unravel the very fabric of reality.
Axe of Bat All
Bat All is a particularly prolific manufacturer of weapons, the industry of which is very young in Dorkland and thus still open to a lot of... Interpretation. This company works out of the Ruptured Archipelago and has a penchant for designing and creating weapons based on animals.
Bat All's latest invention is this strange looking axe, they had initially intended this to serve as a utility axe, providing the wielder with a multitude of functions. This, however, proved too difficult to move from concept to practically and thus, the Axe gained only two functions. The ability to inflict damage based on how hard you swing it and a strange vestigial 'Bat Launcher' head that shoots out a small dart.
Overall, this weapon functions well enough as an axe and we grant it a 5/10, however if you find yourself in need of a one-time use, bat shaped dart launching device, then this gets a 10/10
Forged with blood, sweat and tears
The Armamentari are renowned for their craft of arms and amour. They forge with holy techniques bargained from the God's themselves
Flame-Flash Slicer
Brand new to the scene is the Flame-Flash Slicer™ (Trademark pending)! Have you ever wondered how you could make your sword more flashy and extra slicey? Cover it in flame decals! The Flame-Flash Slicer is the latest in innovation from Sandgliders over in the Desert of Dessert. When we say, this thing is HOT. We mean it!
Every Flame-Flas™ Slicer comes with its own Decal sticker pack, so you can create your own custom design! Wow! Spin your brand-new blade around and watch the latent arcane energies sparkle and dance in the light. What's the point of rushing into battle if you can’t LOOK GOOD while doing it? Buy yours, today!
This entry, sponsored by the Sandgliders Guild!
Warning, Decals may cause: arthritis, blindness, baldness, bad breath, excess snot, hair colour change, water allergies, cats appearing as dogs, sneezing-fart reversal, tongue engorgement, dominant hand fluctuations, muteness, deafness, language/muscle atrophy, flatulence and death.
Fountain Spear
What is it that they say? “The pen is mightier than the sword”? Well, here we have a prime example of the strange literalness that comes from the Isle of left Shoes in the Fountain Spear.
Some clever clogs decided to put this saying to the test, and created this unique but very functional weapon. The swept bladed tip is fantastic as both a piercing and slashing weapon, and the central notch can be used to trap the weapon of an opponent and disarm them.
This weapon is excellent at both puncturing armour and attacking exposed body parts (As well as delivering devastating critiques of your opponent's form. We rate this weapon 8/10 against other armed Dorkis and 10/10 for flowing lyrical prose.
Lore-Master’s Will
(Guys, this is just a pencil, how am I supposed to review this- what? It’s a Giant Pencil? I don't... Look, there are some crazy things out- Fine. Fine, you don't pay me enough for this...).
It’s a Pencil. A Giant Pencil. I guess you can kind of drop it on people or poke them with the end? I feel I must stress. It. Is. A. Pencil.
0/10 for fighting, 10/10 for, I don't know, writing or something?
A Tale of Two Stars: A Story of Dorkland’s Origin
Long ago, there lived a girl named Primaria. She was bright and beautiful and happy.
Unfortunately, Primaria was alone and eventually, she grew bored, restless and sad.
So, Primaria decided to walk the universe, wanting to explore, discover and find adventure.
There could always be more.
She travelled far! Seeing so many wondrous things. One day, she met a cat named Aris!
Aris had beautiful fur, full of stars and planets and moons. Aris, like all cats, was curious. She decided that they would be friends!
And so, Aris and Primaria decided to explore the universe together. To see what else was out there!
This wasn't yet enough.
Over time, Aris and Primaria became closer and closer. The best of friends! But then one day, they discovered something brand new!
There, at the centre of a galaxy, was a pair of intertwined black holes, guzzling up all the planets!
Her name was Thaneria, and as strange and bizarre as she seemed, she wanted friends too! So she decided to come with Primaria.
This wasn't yet enough.
One day, the group of friends discovered an asteroid belt full of strange broken machines! It orbited an old solar system that no longer held life.
The belt was called Sk'net, and Sk'net was bored. They wanted to learn more, see more, understand everything, but they were stuck!
So, the group of friends worked in tandem. They helped Sk'net pull themselves back together into a big ball! Later deciding that they should all continue travelling together.
This wasn't yet enough.
One day, the group of friends spotted a massive comet streaking through the sky! It was covered in a massive lightning storm and flew haphazardly around!
The friends all had to jump out of the way to avoid getting hit! This made some of them grumpy, but others thought it was fun!
The comet introduced itself as Yatark, as it zipped all over the sky. They said they were also looking for friends and wanted to come with them!
This wasn't yet enough.
One day, the group of friends discovered an old, lonely, burnt out Neutron Star. His name was Raktix.
He was very grumpy, and there was nothing left in his solar system. He had been alone for a long time and wasn't used to talking to others
But that was OK! If he came with everyone else, they could give him people to talk too, and he wouldn't be lonely any more, maybe he would be less grumpy too!
This wasn't yet enough.
One day, the group of friends stumbled on a strange sight indeed! A man and a woman, frozen in an eternal embrace in the space between galaxies!
The woman, Aen and the man, Idros. They had been trapped out here for the longest time! Idros says he's been here since the start of the universe!
Aen wanted to come with the group, but Idros wanted to stay where it would be quiet. Eventually, though, Aen convinced him, telling him of all the adventures that could be had together!
This wasn't yet enough.
One day, the group of friends came across a celestial battlefield! There were explosions and clashing of weapons all around!
In the middle of it all were a strange owl being called the Overdork and a patched together devil like creature called the Shaper. They having a great battle that was destroying the universe!
Eventually, after all the friends got together and spoke of all the amazing things that should be saved, not destroyed, the two beings greed to stop direct conflict for the sake of all life and instead join the others to find a better way
This wasn't yet enough.
Finally, one day, the group discovered something amazing and wonderful! Another star! And she was just like Primaria.
Her name was Aequali, she was a Dork star, all strange and wobbly. She had also been travelling the universe looking for friends, but had no luck!
But that was OK, Primaria said she could be friends with everyone that she had met on her travels!
This was... almost enough...
Primaria, Aequali, Aen, Thaneria, Sk'net, Yatark, Raktix, Aen, Idros, The Shaper and The Overdork.
They had explored the universe together, discovered all there was to discover. But... What if, this time, they worked together and made something of their own?
Through their combined power, the group created the world of Dorkland. It was bright and beautiful and happy. They decided they would watch over this world, with its Dorky Dorks and see what Adventures that they might have!
It was finally enough.
Dorkland Legends
There are many tales told by the Dorkis of Dorkland. For fun, for coin and for making a point. Below are several of the more popular tales told within the land.
The Great Winter Wolf
The Shroud is a magical region in constant flux, as the veil between it and the Wilds (The plane of the Fae) is very thin. It is a strange place full of wonder and, well, trees. Quite a lot of them, actually, but that’s not all. Various creatures also roam both worlds. None is more majestic, more powerful or feared than Nora, the great Winter Wolf. She is taller than a man, has thick white fur and a halo of fireflies.
She is the messenger of the Unseelie Court, roaming the lands at night and doing the work of the Winter Queen. Nora is seen as an ill omen by most outlanders, as death and disaster seem to follow in her wake. But, the Shroud Dorkis believe that Nora arrives as a warning to travellers rather than being a herald of disaster.
Natives of the Shroud treat Nora with reverence and leave offerings outside their abodes and campsites. It is also said among Shroud Dorkis that a visit from the Winter Wolf is, in fact, a blessing from the Unseelie, and if one wishes, they can travel with the Wolf back to the Wilds.
Hushed whispers and rumours state that there is a counterpart to Nora, an agent of the Seelie Court, who also roams the Shroud. This agent takes the form of an older Dorkis, looking to trick others into abandoning their reverence for Nora in an attempt to weaken and slay her for some long past slight on their honour.
The most important thing to take from Nora’s tale is this, if you find yourself out in the Shroud and spot a halo of fireflies moving between the trees, you are first to bow and then accept any gift Nora may give. But, be advised, you should do so solemnly. Any expression of emotion or eye contact could be taken as permission to whisk you away into the Wilds.
The Archon of Lore
None of the Nine Prime Gods worshipped in Dorkland is more enigmatic than Sk'Net, God of Knowledge. This deity has many followers and Clerics, but they have the least influence in the world. Their domain is known as the 'Astral Library', and it is here that they store the font of all collected knowledge.
Sk'Net’s Clerics roam the world searching for long-forgotten tales, legends and lore, and then offer them up in ritual at their temple. The ritual involves spiritually connecting to the Astral Library, and this link is facilitated by the most powerful cleric, The Archon of Lore.
The Archon of Lore is the only mortal permitted access to the Astral Library, and the title is held only by the Cleric who has brought the most unknown of knowledge to Sk'Net. The Archon receives information from Clerics on the Material plane, assesses it and then catalogues it within the library.
The current Archon, Jeslyn Maximus, has been the custodian of the Astral Library for the last 300 years and was responsible for uncovering a hidden cult within the worshippers that sought to deny knowledge to Sk'net. The cult believes, once all legends and lore have been collected, that Sk'net's ultimate endgame is to destroy Dorkland, thus preserving the completeness of this world's knowledge.
Of course, Sk'Net's followers say this is unture. That there will always be knowledge to seek. Until there isn't.
THE Wizard
Wizards in Dorkland often attend prestigious schools of learning and universities of magic. The Arcane magic that Wizards wield is brought into being with careful, exact equations and execution. Any slight deviation or miscalculation can spell failure. Or worse, react explosively with the reagents and the caster.
By their very nature, Wizards are profound perfectionists and competitive beyond all reason. This has led to a complex ranking and tier system within their schools and profession. There are various ranks and titles, ‘Apprentice’, ‘Magus’ and ‘High Mage’, but none more prestigious than the very top of the ladder which, by the decree of all Arcane students’ combined ego, is simply known as "THE Wizard".
The current "THE Wizard" is the Dorkis who used to be known as 'Frank van Dork', but tradition dictates that this most honoured title replaces one’s name. THE Wizard, Frank, gained the title relatively recently from a position of obscurity and was formerly known as Frank the "Can’t Get Anything Right". The accepted version of events is that he bested the previous THE Wizard in a magical duel of wits and power that lasted 17 days.
The truth, though? Well, some say there was an Anvil, a painted X on the floor and a plate of pork pies involved. But hey, who are we to judge? Frank has led the wizard orders into a new age of prosperity, drastically changing curriculums within the schools and allowing anyone to join (providing they can pull a rabbit out of a hat!).
Some despise this shift in the norm and, as they are wont to do, some Wizards have been scheming. Some think Frank may be preparing for impending insurrection, as large deliveries of Anvils and Pork Pies are being delivered weekly.
The Tale of the Metal Merchant
Every city has its Taverns, Blacksmiths, Guards, Pedlars and Stores. These things are an expected constant in the world, every traveller knows this.
Additionally, every city in Dorkland has another thing in common, a strange merchant who always seems to have just the items you were looking for, at prices just out of your reach.
A couple of indicators quickly identify this merchant. The first is the ridiculous top hat he wears, and the second is that at least one portion of his body is made of metal.
This man can appear slightly different in each location. Perhaps a different style of Top hat, or an alternative leather coat, even the body part made of metal may vary.
In each version, the man bears bright yellow lettering seemingly stamped across his cheek. This strange tattoo always starts with the same characters, ‘F-View’, but its numerical ending might not always be the same, like so: ‘F-View #0756’ and ‘F-View #2398’.
Some say F-View is a Wizard experiment gone wrong and is the outcome of strange cloning magic. Others believe that he is a traveller from another time, with his alternate selves dispersed throughout the land. Still more, claim that he is some minor deity and does, in fact, exist in all cities at once.
Perhaps we will never know, but one thing is sure! Never elicit a trade with this man, all who do, find themselves on the wrong end of a rotten deal.
Well, except those who he makes rich beyond their wildest dreams that is !
The Red Dragon
The volcano cluster at Obsidian Overlook has remained dormant since its last massive eruption centuries ago. The range rises high over the surrounding area, its pitch-black peaks puncturing the sky. At its foot, a Dorkish village, called Onyx, has stood longer still.
The Dorkis of Onyx utilise the fertile land of the area to grow the most magical herbs, and they supply most of the Kingdom with ingredients for potions.
Unfortunately, Squiggly the Red Dragon has moved into the area of late and has taken up residence in one of the old calderas. The Dragon appears to be spending its time trying to open a rift into the elemental plane of Fire from within the Volcano, attempting to awaken it.
Local Dorkis have tried and failed to repel Squiggly, and he seems to be attracting a following of minor Fire Elementals. One Dorkis did manage to survive a failed attempt to evict the dragon by hiding in a small outcrop of rocks for ten days. The survivor can still be found in Onyx, rambling on about a lovesick dragon who wrote poetry, composed music and painted, all inspired by the love of a Sea Nymph.
The Director of Whispers
Thaneria is the God of Wind, Madness and Death. Together, with Aen and the Overdork, she guides Dorkis’ souls to the underworld when their time comes.
Thaneria has the least presence of the Prime Gods in Dorkland, with very few openly admitting to worship. She is often feared and occupies a tenuous position in the Evil triad of Dorkland’s Prime gods.
Those who do worship her do so at Thaneria's behest. They are known as 'Whisperers'. They travel the land as a living wind, acting as reapers and living testimonials, arriving at plague-ridden towns, battlefields and hospitals to hear the final words of stricken Dorkis and guide them to Thaneria.
Whisperers hold within them the last words of countless Dorkis, and part of their duty to Thaneria is to pass these words onto family or friends after death.
The 'Director of Whispers' is a privileged position within the group. Wendy is the current director, and it is her job to orchestrate the followers of Thaneria to where they are needed and ensure that Dorkis' souls make the final crossing.
Wendy will personally attend the final words of Dorkis with no family or friends, as a Whisperer unable to pass on a Dorkis final breath holds onto them forever. Wendy, unlike regular Whisperers, can manifest a physical form at will, taking on the appearance of those whose words she carries.
Whisperers are feared and respected across Dorkland, as every Dorkis is seen as an equal in their eyes, but their arrival and purpose are purely benign. They exist only because Dorkis do, and they ensure that Dorkis make it to Thaneria once they finally need to rest.
Toy master’s Mk. III Deluxe Jack-in-the-Box
“There once lived a man called T-Three-D Who travelled the world seeking to be free He quested far across land and sea, All to find a mystic, magical key”
This unassuming Jack-in-the-Box is a wondrous sentient artefact housing the soul of the long-forgotten adventurer, T-Three-D. Once a creature attunes to this item, they gain the ability to crank the handle, causing the Jack to pop out of the box.
The Jack animates and acts as the mouthpiece to the soul trapped inside. It has a True Neutral Alignment, and gives random tips and tricks (based on whatever is happening at the time) to the Dorkis who summoned it and will engage in conversation with them until pushed back into the box.
If this soul deems a player worthy, it eventually asks them to go on a quest to retrieve a magic key that will set T-Three-D free.
Dungeon Masters should be aware that once a creature attunes to this item, it curses them. The toy will follow a creature wherever it goes, always appearing nearby and incapable of being left behind. The only way to break this attunement is for another creature to take the Jack-in-the-box voluntarily and attune to it themselves. Additionally, if an Attuned creature does not crank the handle, freeing the Jack, at least once a day, they begin to suffer nightmares of being trapped in a tight, dark space.
The Grave Warden
Once, Sheldon was known as a shepherd to the lost, kind-hearted and rational. He spent his life guiding those without purpose, as well as, helping those who neared the end of their lives pass on peacefully and without regret.
As reward for his life's work, he was raised to demigod status by Aen and bestowed the title of Grave Warden, tasked with guiding lost spirits who cannot make it to the afterlife by themselves. His ascension possessed him with another aspect, however.
There are those who would remove themselves or others from the cycle of life and death, thus resisting Aen's divine portfolio of Destiny, Judgement and Spirits. Sheldon, the Grave Warden, is patron to those who would fight against Necromancers, Lichs, and other Undead as well as protect those who would suffer from their influence.
His aid is usually subtle, but he may lend his divine instrument, which Sheldon named ‘Thoradia’; a shovel-scythe of ghostly green translucency that was a gift from Aen herself. Thoradia, feels sensationless to the touch and is practically weightless. Furthermore, handling it produces no sound, even when dropped.
When situations are truly dire, the Grave Warden has been known to use this weapon to take matters into his own hands, and the Undead in Dorkland collectively shiver when he does.
Who was Tori van Dork?
Tonight's Story - Tori van Dork, psycho killer or misunderstood airhead? This evening we will be releasing Dorkland's first deep dive into the Dorkis who spawned the "Sikrod Conspiracy'' and its cult uprising!
Tori van Dork is probably the most famous Dorkis in all of Dorkland. After all, she was at the epicentre of Sikrod's arrival, and almost single handedly brought chaos and ruin to Dorkland.
But, who was she before she disappeared into the Nether Rift and Evil Clones began to run free into our world?
Tori was a Dorkis of a Gnomish lineage, a hermit by all definitions with an honest to Aris fear of sunlight (As well as, well, essentially everything). She lived under an actual rock in the middle of nowhere, amassing a following of wildlife in her bunker, shielded from the worries of the world.
If you were so inclined, you could have approached her home and listened quietly to hear the ravenous scratching and churning of pencils at any hour, as Tori is constantly capturing images of flora and fauna around her.
This statement could be literal, as rumour states she used some kind of magic to bind creatures to canvas and paper.
She was reported to consume large amounts of mushrooms, making them into all sorts of strange dishes, and grew her sustenance in the tunnels surrounding her bunker. Other reports describe a magical Crystal Greenhouse filled with mystical foods.
The area is known as "Cadman's Bluff" to locals. The name was coined by Tori herself and is derived from an old 'Sci-fi' Author/God she worshipped. Due to Tori’s notoriety, Cadman’s Bluff is now a tourist site, but visitors must take care, as a strange Dog/Bird chimaera creature named 'Abby' stalks the area around the bunker. The beast will chase off all Dorkis who get too close, and seems to be looking for something, perhaps Tori herself. It is said that Abby has outstanding magically cared for teeth. Some even posit that Tori planned to use the teeth in some occult rituals at a later date.
So, folks, we know a little about who Tori van Dork was. But who is she now?
VI
Character Options
Chapter VI: Character Options
Traits/Lineage
The Tables on the next couple of pages show how the various Traits of a Dorki will dictate the Lineage and starting abilities of your Dorkland adventurer. The Ancestry Features are explained in more depth after the tables.
If you are granted a Skill or Tool by your Lineage, which you also get from your Class, then you gain Expertise in that Skill or Tool, adding twice your Proficiency Modifier to it.
Some Traits dont equate to any feature at all while others grant strong starting abilities. The intention was always to have an element of randomness in the generation of a Dorki Adventurer. If a trait is not listed within its section, it confers no Feature.
No Dorki? No problem!
If you do not have a Dorki and would like to use the Lineage options presented below, then you can either roll on the trait sections to produce a random character or, select an option from each of the tables, to create a custom lineage. You can also use the standard published 5e Races within this world.
Habitat (Geographical Heritage)
| Trait | Lineage Prefix | Feature |
|---|---|---|
| Under the Rainbow | Lucky | Random Resistance |
| Personal Computer | Windowed | - |
| Somewhere Odd | Esoteric | - |
| Somewhere Cold | Arctic | Cold Resistance |
| Somewhere Fine | Molten | - |
| Somewhere Fishy | Aquatic | Water Breathing |
| Desert of the Real | - | Fire Resistance |
| Somewhere Peaceful | Solemn | - |
| Somewhere Spotty | Charged | Lightning Resistance |
| Moon Wen? | Lunar | Void Breathing |
| Deep Dream | - | Psychic Resistance |
| Planet Ethereum | Ethereal | - |
Mug (Ancestry)
| Trait | Base Lineage | Type/s | Feature |
|---|---|---|---|
| New Born Fish | Dormant Dorki | Humanoid | Adaptable |
| Woody | Dwarf | Humanoid | Hardy |
| Cat | Beastkin | Beast | Agile |
| Golden | Ascended | Celestial | Angelic Wings |
| Metal | Forged | Construct Humanoid | Autonomous Form |
| Moonlight | Plane Touched | Elemental | Elemental Axiom |
| Mars Light | Half-Elf | Fae Humanoid | Skilled Legacy |
| Mossy | Orci | Monstrosity | Blood Fury |
| Orchid | Half-Orci | Monstrosity Humanoid | Relentless |
| Strawberry | Draconic | Dragon Humanoid | Magic Nature |
| Merfolk | Merfolk | Aberration | Adept of the Seas |
| Zebra | Beastkin | Beast | Agile |
| Rosewood | Elf | Fae | Fae Mind |
| Unobtanium | Infernal | Fiend | Demon Wings |
| Ape | Simian | Beast | Brute Strength |
| Cyclops | Cyclops | Aberration | Mythic Heritage |
Peepers (Eyes)
| Trait | Feature |
|---|---|
| Robo | Dark Vision 90ft |
| Smug Cat | Dark Vision 60ft |
| Mesmeric | Dark Vision 60ft |
| Zombles | Dark Vision 30ft |
| Eyeholes | Blind Sight 30ft |
| Agog | Blight Sight 15ft |
| Buggy | Tremor Sense 30ft |
| Trait | Feature |
|---|---|
| Capsules | Dark Vision 60ft |
| Cat | Dark Vision 60ft |
| Weepy | Dark Vision 60ft |
| Ethereum | True Sight 5ft |
| Vampire | Blind Sight 30ft |
| Socket | Blind sight 15ft |
| Charmed | Tremor Sense 15ft |
Arms (Left + Right)
| Left Trait | Skill |
|---|---|
| Diamond Hand | Nature |
| Magic Top Hat | Arcana |
| Cupcake | Religion |
| Poet | Performance |
| Apple | Medicine |
| Ape | Athletics |
| Lil Ange | Insight |
| Puff | Investigation |
| Cat | Animal Handling |
| Timmy | Survival |
| Wabbit | Stealth |
| Goat | Acrobatics |
| Dorky Pencil | History |
| Control Freak | Sleight of Hand |
| Right Trait | Tool/Skill |
|---|---|
| Diamond Hand | Jeweller |
| Drinki | Brewer |
| Ducky | Intimidation |
| Ice Cream | Perception |
| Cupcake | Painter |
| Lil Devil | Deception |
| Mauritius | Carpenter |
| Alarmist | Weaver |
| Hen | Cook |
| Willow | Woodcarver |
| Magic Rabbit | Smith |
| Dino Fan | Persuasion |
| Ape | Tinkerer |
| Cat | Thieves |
Bod (Body)
| Trait | Feature |
|---|---|
| Merfolk | Unarmed Attack (1d4) |
| Grey Suit | Light Armour |
| Bejewelled | Medium Armour |
| Snuggly | Shields |
| Chequered | Simple Melee Weapons |
| Vampire Royalty | Weapon - Martial Melee |
| Skelemans | Bard Cantrip |
| Banquet | Cleric Cantrip |
| Den | Wizard Cantrip |
| Trait | Feature |
|---|---|
| Vampire | Unarmed Attack (1d6) |
| Jailbird | Light Armour |
| Vest | Medium Armour |
| Gingerbread | Shields |
| Acting Away | Simple Ranged Weapons |
| Humblebee Royalty | Martial Ranged Weapons |
| Humblebee | Druid Cantrip |
| Dorki | Warlock Cantrip |
| Teddy | Wizard Cantrip |
Build-a-Dork
The following pages explain how to build your own Dorkis using the options provided as well as expanding on the Lineage Features listed in the tables in the previous page.
Ability Score Increases
When determining your character's ability scores, increase one of those scores by 2 and increase a different score by 1, or increase three different scores by 1.
Follow this rule regardless of the method you use to determine the scores, such as rolling or point buy.
Lineage Spells
You choose the casting stat for spells granted by your lineage (INT/WIS/CHA) when you select them.
Languages
Your character can speak, read, and write Common and one other language that you and your DM agree is appropriate for the character. The Player's Handbook offers a list of widespread languages to choose from. The DM is free to add or remove languages from that list for a particular campaign.
Movement Speed
All Dorkis have a 30ft Movement speed, unless otherwise augmented by their Lineage
Creature Type
Every creature in D&D, including every player character, has a special tag in the rules that identifies the type of creature they are.
Most player characters are of the Humanoid type. The lineage options presented here tells you what your character's creature type is.
Here's a list of the game's creature types in alphabetical order:
Aberration, Beast, Celestial, Construct, Dragon, Elemental, Fey, Fiend, Giant, Humanoid, Monstrosity, Ooze, Plant, Undead.
These types don't have rules themselves, but some rules in the game affect creatures of certain types in different ways. For example, the cure wounds spell doesn't work on a Construct or an Undead.
A Creature with multiple types can be affected by a rule, providing at least one of its types can be. In the above example, if the Creature was a Beast/Construct, then the Cure Wounds spell would work on them.
Size
Dorki come in all shapes and sizes, any lineage may be Small or Medium in size. You choose this when you create the character.
Sikrod Says
It doesnt matter how hard you train or how long you spend studying. You will never grow powerful enough to defeat me!
Dormant Dorki
Creature Type: Humanoid
Lineage Trait: Latent Adaptability
Dormant Dorki can choose One Feat, One additional skill and 1 additional Language on Character creation.
Lore
"Today will be different, just like every other day!"
Background
Dorkis inhabit all of Dorkland and are spread far, wide, high and low. They all have an intrinsic adaptability, and most take on some form of adaptation from the area they reside or from the history of their bloodline.
However, not all Dorkis family lines have fully expressed this adaptability. There is a subset of Dorkis that retain their original lineage and because of this, find themselves able to rapidly adapt to the situations they find themselves in.
Dorkis of this lineage hold the spark of potential and possibility within their soul.
Dwarven Dorki
Creature Type: Humanoid
Lineage Trait: Hardy
Your hardy nature grants you an additional +1 HP every time you level up, additionally, you add your proficiency bonus to the healing granted by any hit die you roll.
Lore
“Why does everyone think I spend time down In the mines? This Pickaxe is just for show, it brings out the sparkle in my lantern. Honestly, the people in this town have absolutely no taste”
Background
Dwarven Dorkis hail from the hills, mountains and dark below both. They are of shorter stature than most other Dorkis, but often hardy by nature.
They are often presumed to be excellent craftspeople, due to the impressive equipment they wield, but they are simply more aware of the latest fashions than most Dorkis.
Ascended Dorki
Creature Type: Celestial
Lineage Trait: Angelic Blood
Infused with the power of the Celestials, you can, as a bonus action, manifest a pair of feathered wings which sprout from your back, granting a Fly speed equal to your walk speed.
While manifested, you shed bright light in a 5ft radius around you. These wings remain until you diffuse them with another bonus action, are knocked unconscious or killed.
Lore
"She watched as another of her companions fell to the onslaught of evil pouring out of the rift. She felt numb and powerless as the end approached, maw dripping with hunger.
Suddenly, she felt it, a light welling up from deep inside. A burning, powerful rage. It demanded to be freed, let loose into the world. To be unleashed on her foes.
With a blinding roar, a pair of pristine, feathered wings exploded from her back, humming with a divine light. The creatures recoiled from the brightness as she rose into the air.
Today, the Demon Spawn would be the ones to know fear."
Background
Ascended Dorkis are touched by the divine energies of the celestial plane. Some were born in hallowed temples, others have an Angel in their family tree, and others still may be marked by the Celestials for something greater.
Not all Ascended are aware of their birthright until they grow older and face the world. Due to this, there has been a stark increase in their numbers in Dorkland now that Sikrod has arrived with his armies.
Plane Touched
Creature Type: Elemental
Lineage Trait: Elemental Axiom
At character creation, choose one of the below 8 Damage Types. You are immune to damage of this type, but you are Vulnerable to the damage type above or below it:
| Fire | Lightning | Radiant | Poison |
| Cold | Thunder | Necrotic | Acid |
Lore
“Poison! Necrotic! Acid! By our powers combined, we will take you down, villainous cur!
Uh… wait… that’s pretty evil sounding, Acid is... pretty painful. And, and... Poison is...
Are… are we the Bad Guys?”
Background
Plane Touched Dorkis are born with some connection to the primal elements of the world. This can occur in a multitude of ways, the most common of which is having a parent or ancestor who is themselves a denizen of one of the elemental planes.
These Dorkis often exhibit signs of their Elemental affinity on their body. Such as stone scales, flaming eyes or frozen hair.
Infernal Dorki
Creature Type: Infernal
Lineage Trait: Demonic Blood
Infused with the power of Demons, you can, as a bonus action, manifest a pair of Bat wings which sprout from your back, granting a Fly speed equal to your walk speed.
While manifested, the area in a 5ft radius around you is considered one light level lower (I.e. Bright Light becomes Dim and Dim Light becomes Darkness). These wings remain until you diffuse them with another bonus action, are knocked unconscious or killed.
Lore
"Fire... It had always had a special... Call? Like it was begging for attention, wanted nothing more than to be caressed and given the strength to grow... I had always had a special fondness for it when growing up.
As I grew older, my lust for the flame only grew. I indulged that base desire on several occasions, once I even burned a farmhouse to the ground. I knew it was wrong, but it just felt so, so right.
Then, the true monsters came, Sikrod and his ilk, devastating the land. Suddenly, like a fire flashing over, I found my true calling. Turns out, where monstrous creatures are concerned, a Fire Mage is everydorks best friend."
Background
Infernal Dorkis are touched by the Demonic energies of the infernal plane. Some were born in cursed lands, others have a Demon in their family tree, and others still may be marked by Demons for something greater.
Not all Infernals are aware of their birthright until they grow older and face the world. Due to this, there has been a stark increase in their numbers in Dorkland now that Sikrod has arrived with his armies.
Damage Resistance and Vulnerability (PHB p197)
If a creature or an object has vulnerability to a damage type, damage of that type is doubled against it.
Elven Dorki
Creature Type: Fae
Lineage Trait: Fae Mind
You cannot be Charmed, Feared or forced to sleep. You do not need sleep and can complete a Long rest in 4 Hours by spending the time meditating about the day.
Half-Elven Dorki
Creature Type: Humanoid/Fae
Lineage Trait: Skilled Legacy
You gain one skill proficiency of your Choice and learn one Cantrip from the Wizard spell list. You chose the casting stat for this (INT/WIS/CHA) when you select it.
Lore
“Magic… you can almost just reach out and touch it, it’s everywhere! In me, in you and in the world around us. Once you grow up a little more, then you’ll be able to see it like I do, like the rest of us do. And then, you’ll see the world as it truly is.”
Background
Elven Dorki are touched by the magic of the world, as well as the influence of the Fae from the Shroud. They are innately caring and inclusive people, settling into almost any culture with ease.
This is largely why their influence is so widespread, and why there are even distinct ‘Half-Elven’ Dorki people.
Orci Dorki
Creature Type: Monstrosity
Lineage Trait: Blood Fury
When a creature that you can see dies, you can use your reaction to move up to half your speed in any direction.
Half-Orci Dorki
Creature Type: - Humanoid/Monstrosity
Lineage Trait: – Relentless
Once per day, when damage would reduce you to 0 HP, you can instead choose to remain at 1 HP.
Lore
“Today, you enter adulthood, young one! You have passed the Blood Trials of my father and his father before him.
You have passed my Bone trial and most importantly, you have passed your mother's trial of the Spirit.
Go now, out into the world. Earn many names and bring your family pride and honour.”
Background
Orci Dorkis are a ferocious bunch, often living in the harsher climates of the world, they vie with the strong natural predators for resources.
They are strong-willed people that are loyal, hard-working and strong. They believe in personal strength as well as that of familial bonds.
Orci Dorkis are so widespread and interspersed with other cultures and lineages that they have a distinct ‘Half-Orci Dorki’ subset.
Draconic Dorki
Creature Type: Humanoid/Dragon
Lineage Trait: Arcane Nature
You have Advantage on all WIS, INT and CHA saving throws that you make.
Lore
“You fool, you think because I have a scaled tail and fangs that I’m loaded down with gold? You would harass me down this alley way, and think to mug me, ME?! It’s laughable. Hahahaha…
Oh no, no, no, you come back here. I think I might have seen some shinies in your pocket, and my hoard could always do with more!”
Background
Draconic Dorki descend from the magic and influence of Dragons. They often have scales, tails and claws similar to their patronage and an innate desire to amass items of worth.
They are powerful people, and are known for being controlled by their emotions, feeling them much more strongly than most Dorkis do.
Cyclopian Dorki
Creature Type: Beast
Lineage Trait: Mythic Heritage
You have Advantage on all STR, DEX and CON saving throws that you make.
Lore
“Come; gather round, I have much to say and little time to say it. The Dragons of the peak stir, their peace with our kind should not be mistaken for kindness. We are nothing more than useful pawns to them.
But the Dragons sing, and when I catch the wind in the quiet of the night, I hear their song. Evil is coming, and we must all prepare for war.”
Background
The rarest of Dorkis, Cyclopian Dorkis owe their strange mono-eyed appearance to their association with the power of myth and legend.
They say that stories hold a magic of their own, and these Dorkis are no exception. Their clans weave magic and spoken word together, altering the very fabric of reality with a simple story.
Forged
Creature Type: Humanoid/Construct
Lineage Trait: Autonomous Form
Due to your manufactured nature, you do not need to Eat, Drink or Breath; you also gain a +1 bonus to your AC.
Lore
“The forge is hot; I know this because I have been told. The metal is heavy; I know this because I have been told. The work is hard; I know this because I have been told.
I will become a hero; I know this because it is what I am.”
Background
Forged Dorkis are those constructed instead of born. Some are built from Metals, others out of Wood and a select few from the essence of pure magic itself. They are often utilised in manufacturing and labour industries.
Most look upon them with Awe, but some fear or distrust their nature. Forged Dorkis usually create and settle within their own sub-communities within towns and cities, and rarely travel alone.
Beastkin
Creature Type: Beast
Lineage Trait: Agile
You gain +10ft to your Movement Speeds and can take the Dash Action as Bonus Action.
Merfolk
Creature Type: Aberration
Lineage Trait: Adept of the Seas
You can breathe underwater and gain a 30ft Swim Speed.
Simian
Creature Type: Beast
Lineage Trait: Brute Strength
You count as one size larger when Grappling and for Encumbrance and you gain a 30ft Climb Speed.
Background
The animalist lineages of Dorkland bear resemblance to the natural fauna of the world. These Dorkis have been influenced, one way or another, by the traits of these creatures and often exhibit instinctual behaviour.
These Dorkis often seek each other out when in towns and cities and form tight nit sub cultures within. They are usually looked upon with scorn and seen as a sign of ill omen.
Rogue
Shadow of Sikrod
Shadows of Sikrod are Rogues that have been warped by Sikrod’s dark power. Some Dorkis willingly give themselves over to this, but most practitioners are the Evil Dorkis Clones that Sikrod brought with him to Dorkland.
They fight dirty, using cheap tricks and dishonourable tactics. Some Shadow of Sikrod Rogues even allow themselves to be struck by their enemies so that they can move in close and unleash devastating counter attacks.
Deep Cuts
Starting at 3rd Level, the scent of weakness in the air drives you to fight harder.
If the target of your sneak attack is missing any of its HP, you may reroll 1s and 2s on your sneak attack dice, using the new result even if it is lower.
Additionally, when you trigger sneak attack with a melee attack, the target has Disadvantage on the next attack roll it makes against you.
Revel in Conflict
Also at 3rd level, your love of direct conflict has given you a unique medical skill set.
You gain proficiency in the Medicine skill, your proficiency bonus is doubled for any ability check you make with this skill.
Additionally, you gain a new option as part of your Cunning Action, you can patch the deepest wounds in but a moment. You can spend one Hit Die to heal yourself. Roll the die, add your CON Mod, and regain a number of hit points equal to the total (minimum of 1).
You can use this feature an amount of times equal to your proficiency bonus and regain all expended uses after a long rest.
Coup De Grâce
Starting at 9th Level, you've learnt that an opponent is most vulnerable when they think they have the upper hand.
When you activate your Uncanny Dodge Feature against a melee attack, you can choose to not reduce the incoming damage and instead deal half the damage you take back to the attacker. Additionally, you now regain all spent Hit Die after a long rest.
Sikrod's Visage
At 13th Level, you become a true terror as your exploits draw the eyes of Sikrod himself. You can add your proficiency bonus to your initiative rolls and have Advantage on Charisma Checks.
Additionally, when you spend a Hit Die as part of your Revel in Conflict feature, you also gain temporary HP equal to the HP you restore.
Dark Accent
At 17th Level, you become infused with a mote of Dread power from Sikrod himself. You are immune to Poison damage and the Poisoned Condition, and you have advantage on saves against being Charmed or Frightened.
Additionally, when you trigger your Coup De Grâce Feature, you deal twice the damage back to the attacker.
Hit Die (PHB p186)
"At the end of a long rest, a character regains all lost hit points. The character also regains spent Hit Dice, up to a number of dice equal to half of the character's total number of them. You regain at least 1 Hit Die when you finish a long rest."
Bard
College of the Living Canvas
She sat upon the roots of the Great Tree, the twin suns shining down upon her and her work. She was finishing drawing an intricate piece in her journal. A piece filled with colour and purpose, with Dragons and Fire.
She saw them approaching her, shrouded in the shadows of the wood, with malice in their hearts. She rose from the roots of the Great Tree and as she did so, the Fire and Dragons of her creation rose with her, swirling around her, leaping off of the pages and into the world."
Bards that study under the teachings of the "Living Canvas" specialise in creating fantastical works of art through various mediums. The most common are Paintings, Sketches and Calligraphy.
Bards with this training bring their art to life to fight with and aid them in their travels. A Painter might create a cave to weather a storm, a Sketcher might animate a page of swords to assail their enemies and a Calligrapher may animate the word "Light", which follows them, glowing and brightening the area.
Tools of the Trade
At 3rd level, when you join this College, you gain proficiency with Painter's and Calligrapher's Supplies. Your proficiency bonus is doubled for any checks you make with these tools
Praxic Guardian
Also at 3rd level, you learn the 'Summon Beast' Spell. You can cast it without consuming Spell Slots by consuming 1 or more Bardic Inspiration die.
When cast this way, the spell level increases by the number of dice rolled (To a maximum of your highest level spell slot) and the spell no longer requires Concentration.
You must have either your Painter's supplies or Calligraphers supplies in hand to cast it this way, and they replace the Material component.
At 6th level, you also learn the 'Summon Shadow spawn' Spell, which you can use in the same way.
Flavour is King
Think about the way you use your Calligrapher and Artists Tools when you cast your Bard spells and use your Bard features, flavour these abilities with this in mind. For instance, your Praxic Guardian may appear as a sketched drawing or bizarre mosaic art piece.
Praxis of Protection
At 6th level, you learn to weave your abilities into protection for you and your allies. With your Painter's or Calligrapher's Supplies in hand, you can weave a Praxis of Protection over your body. The Praxis takes 1 min to complete and appears as you choose, covering the majority of your skin.
While the Praxis covers you, you have advantage on STR and DEX saving throws and allies within 10ft of you have 1/2 cover as it leaps off of your body to defend them.
The Praxis lasts for 1 hour, then falls off as liquid ink or flowing paint. You can choose to end the Praxis early as an Action and, in so doing, force all creatures within 10ft of you to make a STR Save vs. your Spell Save DC or be knocked back 10ft and pushed prone by an explosion of Ink or Paint.
You can use this ability a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus, regaining these uses after a long rest.
Cover (PHB p196)
"A target with half cover has a +2 bonus to AC and Dexterity saving throws. If a target is behind multiple sources of cover, only the most protective degree of cover applies; the degrees aren't added together."
Alter the Narrative
Starting at 14th level, your ability to impart your will upon your works of art has grown so powerful that you can alter the fabric of reality itself, if only for a moment.
With your Painter's or Calligrapher's Supplies in hand you can, over the course of 1 hour, create a 'Narrative', this is an intricate work of art, infused with your magic and a culmination of your expertise.
Once it is finished, you cast a limited version of the spell 'Wish' and reality alters in tune to your 'Narrative'. For instance, you may paint away the Vault Door of a Bank, write that a dead man lives once more or draw a Meteor Shower in the sky.
Any and all changes brought about by this feature revert after 1 hour. Damage inflicted is healed, buildings destroyed are repaired, and people raised to life fall dead once more.
After you alter the narrative, you must wait one week before altering it again
VII
Treasure Trove
Chapter VII: Treasure Trove
Magic Items!
The weapons, armour and items listed in this chapter are meant as templates of abilities, they can appear as +1/+2/+3 variants or even as a different type of item (Such as a Magic shield's abilities being present on a suite of armour) and as such, lack a rarity rating. They are listed below in the form they most often take.
Robes of the Dark Star
Light Armour (Requires Attunement by a Warlock)
Boon of the Dark Star:
While attuned to this armour, you may select 1 additional Warlock Invocation. Access to that invocation is lost if your Attunement is broken in any way.
Strength of the Void:
As a Bonus Action, you may regain your spent warlock spell slots. You can do this once, then regain the use of the ability after a long rest.
Shadow Stalkers Guise
Light Armour (Requires Attunement)
Stalker:
When you are in dim light or darkness, you may, as a bonus action, teleport up to 30ft to an unoccupied space you can see that is also in dim light or darkness.
Burning/Crackling/Frozen Mail
Light/Medium/Heavy Armour
Elemental Infusion:
The first 3 points of Fire/Lighting/Cold damage that the wearer takes from an Attack or Spell is ignored.
(To determine this items' element when first acquired, Roll a d6, 1-2 Fire, 3-4 Lightning, 5-6 Cold)
Rapid Protection Harness
Medium/Heavy Armour
"This custom-made Breastplate sports the latest technology and materials. There is an attached gauntlet with wires and servos that link to a magnet on the back of the armour."
Prototype Shield Harness
You can, as an object interaction, Don or Doff a shield that was attached to the back of this armour. Only one shield may be attached in this way at a time.
The Second Verse
Light/Medium Armour (Requires Attunement)
"...and so the tempo builds towards the fated crescendo."
Amplify
You gain Resistance to Psychic damage, additionally; any Psychic damage you deal ignores resistances (but not immunities).
Shield Rig
Medium Armour (Requires Attunement)
"This Cuirass is old and dusty with bone meal. There are strange runes running along the length, and it sits heavy and tight on you.""
Shield Generator
This armour allows you to cast the 'Shield' spell, you can do this once and regain the ability to do so after a short rest.
White Dragon Armour
Heavy Armour (Requires Attunement)
"This set of mundane plate armour has been augmented with the scales and bones of a White Dragon."
Ice Heart
You have Resistance to Cold Damage, Additionally you have Advantage against dragons 'Frightful Presence' ability
Aegis of the Light
Shield (Requires Attunement)
"This enormous silver tower shield is emblazoned with the relief of a flaming winged woman."
Light’s Aegis
As a Bonus Action, you may extend a warming light from your Shield, granting allies within 10ft of you a bonus +3 to their AC.
You may retract the light as another Bonus Action. Your movement is reduced to 0 while this effect is active.
Attunement (PHB p136)
"An item can be attuned to only one creature at a time, and a creature can be attuned to no more than three magic items at a time."
Reactive Shield
Shield (Requires Attunement)
Reactive armour:
After taking damage, you may use your reaction to gain a bonus of +1 AC until the end of your next turn.
Hard Light Shield
Shield (Requires Attunement)
"We will forge armour from their weapons, and in so doing, we will overcome."
Hard Light Construct:
You have Resistance to Radiant Damage while attuned to this shield.
Barrier Generator:
As an Action, you can reduce your Speed to 0 and cause the power source in the shield to go into overdrive.
The shield expands 10ft out around you, granting everyone inside it Half-Cover and empowering ranged attacks fired out of it to deal +1d8 Radiant damage.
The Shield lasts until you use another Action to end it.
Capacitor Shield
Shield (Requires Attunement)
Spell Storing
This shield acts as a Ring of Spell Storing, and is able to store up to 3 Levels of spells.
Pavise Shield
Shield
Deployable Cover:
As an action, you may plant this shield in the ground, providing half cover from frontal attacks.
You do not need to be Proficient with shields or have the shield donned to use this feature.
Thunderstone Dagger
Dagger
Energy Blade
Lightning from the perpetual storm infuses this shard of stone, it deals an extra 2d6 (Lightning) damage on hit.
Additionally, it can be used as a Focus for spells.
Jenny
Dagger
Blunt Blade
Due to the age and wear of this weapon, it deals only 1 damage on a hit instead of a dagger’s usual 1d4
Rusty Malign
A creature taking damage from this weapon must make a DC 10 CON save or be Poisoned for 1 Hour
Adam's Fall
Longsword (Requires Attunement)
Kinetic Counter
When a creature misses you with an attack, you may use your reaction to absorb a portion of the potential damage.
Your next attack with this weapon against that creature has Advantage.
Ascher’s Lament
Shortsword (Requires Attunement)
Flame On
This weapon deals 2d6 Fire damage, instead of a Shortswords usual 1d6 Piercing damage.
Flame Counter
When you take damage from a melee attack, you may use your reaction to make one attack with this weapon against the creature that damaged you.
Inevitable
Greatsword (Requires Attunement)
"...What lives, must die, what dies, must be reborn, what is reborn, must live, what lives..." Said to have been wielded by a powerful Infernal in the lost past of another world.
Touch of the Forsaken
This Sword deals an extra 2d8 Necrotic damage on a hit.
Circle of Life:
On a kill, the Necrotic damage rolled heals the wielder.
Körrin's Oath
Longbow (Requires Attunement by a Ranger)
“With my eye, I mark you. With my mind, I see your fall. With my hand, I end you”
Körrin's Oath
If you target a creature who is afflicted by your Hunter's Mark, you make the attack with Advantage.
Dawn's Light
Spear (Requires Attunement by a Good Aligned creature)
3 Charges, Regain 1 charge after a long rest
"...and on the day she ascended to the heavens, her might and majesty bright and aflame for all to see, she cast off her earthly possessions and Dawn's light fell to the world of mortals. The land burned, cracked, charred and sank into the depths of the world as she rose."
Dawn's Light (3 Charges)
Cast the spell Dawn, centered on you (You are immune to the damage of this version of Dawn.)
Lights Embrace
If thrown, this weapon returns to your hand after the attack. Hit or miss, the target must make a DC 15 DEX save or take 1d8 Radiant damage as spears of light descend on them.
Touch of the Divine
This Spear belonged to an unknown Goddess, and is still infused with holy energy. It deals an extra 2d8 Radiant damage on a hit.
Lucky Scimitar
Scimitar (Requires Attunement)
What Luck!
This weapon has a single Luck point (as per the feat) which recharges after a long rest.
Additionally, this weapon grants +1 to attack and damage rolls
Starfall Hammer
Maul (Requires Attunement)
"...and so the sky cracked open, I fell to the world below, and my majesty was laid bare for all to see."
Giga-Impact:
After dealing damage to a target, you may choose to knock them prone, any creatures other than you within 10ft of the target then take 2d8 Fire damage.
You can activate this ability once, and regain the ability to do so after a short or long rest.
Magma Burn
This Weapon deals an extra 2d8 Fire Damage on a hit.
Cloak of the Flame Wolf
Cloak (Requires Attunement)
Flame Shield
As a reaction to taking fire damage, you may interpose the cloak between yourself and the source, granting you resistance to the Damage of that attack.
Ring of the Grave Warden
Ring (Requires Attunement)
Wraith Shift
When rolling initiative, you gain an extra turn for the first round, at count 25 (Winning ties).
During this turn, you take on a translucent appearance and may only use your movement and the Disengage or Dodge Actions.
Open Game Licence
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